Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to salute the Boston Red Sox for their great victory last night. I'd also like to remind the good citizens of New York and Yankee fans all around the country that I bear no ill will towards the Yankees, as I rooted for them before I rooted against them. However, I must now cast my allegiance to the BoSox, because that reminds me of my second favorite cure-all...next to stem cells. And, like the Red Sox, my running mate and I will take the ball to the end zone for victory in November.