"Firewall": Rooting for the Viruses
Firewall is a humorless slog without a single original thought. Much as today's TV crime sleuthing shows use as crutches the ubiquitous safety nets of DNA testing and surveillance cameras that yield vivid images at 5,000% magnification, Firewall invites us to believe that laptop batteries never die, wireless internet access never fails, cops are dumber than stumps, and $100 fax machines can be made into high-speed, high-resolution scanners when connected to iPods.
Did I mention this movie is humorless? OK, that's perhaps a bit harsh. Anyone who knows anything about computers, networks, electronics, cell phones or electricity will find things to laugh at, although I'm pretty sure that's not what the script writers were going for.
Or you could just laugh at the stupid evangelical Christian guy who was the token "gullible white male" needed to make part of the plot work. This plot element might have been a wise choice by the writers. After all, if you feel the need to mock people of faith, Christians are the obvious choice, since they're not likely to set anything on fire in protest.
In the end, Harrison Ford isn't too old to fake being an action star, but I did figure he was too smart to get involved in something like this. Apparently, we both made errors in judgment.
Trivia Notes: Dell and Chrysler apparently had the product placement contracts for Firewall, although Ford's architect wife did have a 30" Apple Cinema Display in her home office.... The home featured in the movie bore a striking resemblance to the one featured in Elektra, another underwhelming Hollywood effort... The closing scene in Firewall was evocative of the last scene in another "family hostage action movie": The Sound of Music. No, really.
Sounds like you should have opted to go with us when we took Kevin to see "Curious George". It was his first theater movie experience. Apparently, parts of the movie are hilarious to the 3 year old crowd. And, the buttered popcorn made a big impression as well.
Posted by: Cindy at February 13, 2006 04:20 PMCindy, considering that "Curious George" beat out "Firewall" in the weekend box office, I apparently have the mind of a three year old. Which, now that I think about it, is a step in the right direction.
I'll bet it *was* fun to participate in Kevin's first movie experience. Can you even remember Elizabeth's first?
Posted by: Eric at February 13, 2006 04:24 PMsounds like last Saturday on my route.
Posted by: Jim at February 14, 2006 09:09 PMAbout the publisher
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"After all, if you feel the need to mock people of faith, Christians are the obvious choice, since they're not likely to set anything on fire in protest."
Nicely put, Eric!
...and very true.
Even "The Passion" didn't inspire any violence against, much less, by Jews.
Posted by: Mr. Freen at February 13, 2006 03:45 PM