Mad Dogs and Aggies
Category: Travel...
Posted Tuesday, August 14, 2007 at 08:44 PM [GMT-6]

I opted out of the New Student Conference today, choosing to stay at the hotel while the Nephew, his mom and my wife went through the orientation. I couldn't decide which might be more humiliating for the Nephew: showing up with three family members in tow, or being marked as "that kid with two mommies," but the prospect of the second made me laugh, and that's the one I went with. Anyway, I had work to do.

I also wanted to do something that I hadn't done voluntarily in more than 30 years, and that's run around and through the A&M campus. The last time I did it, it was under duress and I was wearing combat boots.

I worked until about 9:30 then put on my running gear and drank half a bottle of water and walked out into the blast furnace. They were forecasting a high of 104° (that doesn't count the heat index) and I had no reason to doubt them.

Our hotel is just a block from the northeast corner of the campus, so I walked to the intersection of George Bush Drive and Texas Avenue – one of the busiest intersections in town, and the scene of ongoing construction that started in the Roosevelt administration (Teddy, that is). I was already starting to sweat, and I hadn't actually made it onto the campus.

What follows is a brief list of the main points on my route, probably of interest to no one except those familiar with the campus. But you can follow along on this Google Map if you have nothing better to do.

• I started running along George Bush Drive, heading southwest, along the golf course. People were playing golf, but I was the only runner in sight.


• I had generally remembered that College Station is flat. It's not.


• Continuing down GB Drive, I passed the drill field where the bonfires were held when we were students, and the Band Dorm where I spent the longest two semesters of my life.


• A half mile further down the road and I was alongside Kyle Field, which I'm sure would have been an impressive sight had I not been blinded by sweat. Still no other runners.


• I turned right at Wellborn Road and ran past the two indoor football fields. Across the road was the baseball stadium (Olsen Field). This was a good direction to run, because there was a slight cooling breeze and sporadic shade.


• Moving along Wellborn Road brought back memories, some of venues and buildings that no longer exist, like the outdoor pavilion where students gathered for impromptu rock concerts and movies.


• I made the corner at University and Wellborn, heading back northeast and enjoying the temporary shade of the USDA building. Just past that building was my old dorm, Crocker Hall, renown at the time for its hippie leanings. Not that I would know anything about any of that. Nosiree. Today, all I could smell was the odor of cheeseburgers wafting from the Dixie Chicken, which brought an unusual combination of hunger and nausea. I glance past the Chicken and see a huge edifice a block or two behind it with a big sign designating it as "The Tradition." I'm guessing it's fancy off-campus student housing, and it strikes me as amusing that something so new would be referred to as a tradition.


• Running past North Gate, I flashed back to the location of the jewelry store where I bought the engagement and wedding ring set for my then wife-to-be. I think I paid around $300 for it, and that was just about the most money I'd ever paid for anything in my life. The jewelry store is long gone, but she still wears the rings.


• I continue down University, and I'm starting to feel the humidity. Still haven't seen another runner, and the few pedestrians I pass on the sidewalk eye me with skepticism, as they might a rabid dog. I draw even with the Chipotle at the corner of University and College (I know; it sounds redundant to me, as well), and decide to run through campus over to New Main Drive, where there are trees. And shade.


• I run east on Bizzell and then loop around on Ross. The administration building is where I worked as a multilith operator (look it up) for the Agricultural Extension Service.


• I hang a left onto New Main Drive (I forget what it was called when I was a student, but I don't think it was that) and run past the Bonfire Memorial, a beautiful and moving tribute to the students who lost their lives in 1999 when the stack collapsed. I worked on the bonfire when I was a freshman. It was an amazing experience.


• Thirty minutes have passed since I started running, and I'm fried. I walk the rest of the way back to the hotel, probably about another mile. I finally pass another runner, coming toward me. He looks a lot like Brad Pitt, and I remember thinking, great; why couldn't it have at least been Angelina?. I'm also trying really hard to keep from weaving on the sidewalk, and I try to do a math problem in my head to stay focused on staying conscious. I tried to figure out what percentage of the radius of a circle is traveled when you run a quarter of the circumference. I can visualize the equation in my mind (c/4 = 2πr – or something like that), but I can't quite work it out.


• I make it back to the hotel room where the a/c has kept things frosty, man, and I immediately throw up four times in succession. Just kidding. It was only two. Just kidding. After I regain consciousness on the floor, I saw no signs of pukitude, so I'm pretty sure I didn't throw up at all. Just kidding. I did drink a bottle of water and spent another 30 minutes sweating, but otherwise I felt no ill effects. At 10:45 a.m., the temperature was 94° with a heat index of 99.

The best thing about this experience is that I don't have to repeat it. Unlike a certain freshman I know.