Fools, Children & Recumbent Riders

Someone once wrote that God takes care of fools and little children. He surely also has a soft spot in His heart for at least two recumbent tandem bicycle riders, as proven by the events of this morning.

MLB and I set out on our usual Saturday morning bike ride, enjoying the relatively cool and calm weather. We headed out on our usual route, which winds through about three miles of residential streets before leaving the city limits on the service road of a well-traveled state highway. As we were passing through the last few blocks of housing, we spotted another recumbent rider. He was going the opposite direction but made a u-turn and pedaled to catch up to us.

Now, while we're always happy to visit with folks about recumbents, we actually prefer riding alone or riding in the company of friends. This morning, we were engaged in a conversation and didn't really want to interrupt it to make small talk with a stranger, even if he was a kindred 'bent spirit. So we kept up our pedaling cadence and made him work to catch up with us. We exchanged a few pleasantries and he observed that we were in a bigger hurry than he was, and he dropped back.

We didn't feel badly, because we immediately overtook another cyclist -- another recumbent cyclist, no less -- and he and the first fellow seemed to be riding at the same speed. Surely they would be able to converse to their heart's content.

It's important to understand that recumbent cyclists, while not unknown in these parts, are still a bit rare, and to pass two in short order is almost unheard of. (And, in fact, we spotted another one across the divided highway, heading back into town, just a few hundred yards down the road after our encounter with the first two.) If you care about such things, the first cyclist was riding a Vision, which is a short wheelbase model, and it has underseat steering like our Ryan Duplex tandem. The second rider was on a Rotator, a somewhat rarer model with a long wheelbase and above-the-seat steering like my Easy Racer single recumbent.

Anyway, within about 15 minutes we had left the two riders a mile behind. That's when the unexpected happened: a loud hissing sound emanated from the front of our bicycle and we knew immediately that it meant a flat tire.

Now, the only thing rarer than passing two 'bents on a ride in west Texas is for us to have a flat tire on our tandem. We've owned it for six years, and this was the first flat we'd experienced on the front tire. We'd had a couple on the back tire, but it had been several years since those had occurred.

You can see this coming, can't you? After six years without a flat tire, you get a little complacent. Well, I do, anyway. I wasn't carrying a spare tube. We had several patch kits with us, so it looked like I'd have to fix the flat instead of just doing a quick change of tubes.

We had just passed an underpass when the flat occurred, so I wheeled the bike around and walked it back to get us out of the sun. I removed the wheel while MLB held the front end of the bike off the ground, and then I ran a tire tool around both beads and pulled the tire and tube away from the rim.

While I was inspecting the tube, the easier-riding cyclists rode into view. They spotted us and immediately turned off the road and headed our way, with offers to help. I explained our predicament...it wasn't serious, thanks anyway, just one of those things...but they wanted to stick around just to make sure.

So they chatted with MLB about our bike and theirs while I affixed our tire pump onto the tube, intending to inflate it to find the location of the hole. All the while, I had this nagging little thought: what if it's the valve stem? I'd been having trouble with my floor pump over the past couple of months. The rubber grommet (or whatever you call the doohicky that goes over the valve) wasn't sealing properly and I had to work it around on the valve to get an airtight connection. I worried that I was somehow damaging the valve stem by rubbing it against the edge of the hole where it emerged from the rim. But, had I worried enough to (a) buy a new pump or (b) closely inspect the valve stems? That would be a "no," and another "no."

Sure enough, the hissing repeated itself from the base of the stem. Verdict: unfixable with anything I had on hand. That's when the guy riding the Rotator spoke up. "That's a 20" wheel, isn't it?" "Yeah," I replied. "Well, I've got an extra tube with me, if you want it."

Let's see...we're eight miles from home with a 10' long bike -- meaning that very few good samaritan vehicles could haul us back into town -- and we have no way of correcting the mechanical problem brought on by my stupidity. I would normally have refused to take another cyclist's only backup tube, but in this case, I immediately said "we'll take it!"

It was at that point that I noticed that his rims were drilled for Presta valves, and ours took the more familiar Schraeder valves. OK, that's not a problem. The Prestas are smaller in diameter so they'll still fit; we'd have been hosed had it been the other way around.

Then I happened to glance down at my rim, and the decal bearing the number 18 finally sunk into my addled brain. "Oh, man...we don't have a 20" wheel; it's 18"!"

"Well," the guy replied, "that's not necessarily a problem. You might be able to make a 20" tube work on an 18" rim. There'll be some loose play, but it should still get you back into town." Again, had it been the other way around, it's doubtful that I could have made a smaller tube fit on a larger rim.

I quickly mounted the tube and tire and started pumping air. The tube inflated quickly, another pleasant surprise, since I had never had occasion to use our frame-mounted tire pump (see, I hadn't gone out totally unprepared). It proved to be a very efficient piece of equipment.

I noticed the tire bulging a bit in one spot, doubtless because of the way the tube was doubled up in places, so I let out some air, massaged the tire and tube and reinflated it. The bulge was gone. I didn't feel comfortable inflating it to a normal pressure, which would be at least 80 psi, as I was unsure of the effect on the ill-fitting tube. On the other hand, an underinflated tube has two significant drawbacks. First, it's susceptible to pinch flats, meaning that the tube gets pinched against the rim when you roll over a rock or even a bump in the road. Second, it makes the bike handling really squirrelly. However, I figured we'd be going slow enough back into town to mitigate both those risks. I put an estimated 40 psi in the tire and we mounted the bike for the trip back home.

The guy who donated his tube (OK, I insisted on giving him $5, although he was perfectly willing to let me have the tube) was going to continue his ride. The other fellow decided to head back to town with us. This time, we were quite content to mosey along and converse about rides and bicycles. Our tandem was a little loose on the front end, but nothing too scary, and the tube seemed to be holding air just fine. Our companion stayed with us until we were back inside the city limits, when I insisted that he go back to the route he had intended to ride before we messed things up. We parted company with a smile and a wave, and we made it back home without further incident. I trust that Tom (the tube donor) and Kent (the escort) did as well.

It's amazing to consider the happy "coincidences" that occurred to bail us out of our predicament. There are lots of cyclists on the road we were on, but only a recumbent, with its smaller front wheel, could have helped us. The fact that the other riders stopped at all might seem a little odd, depending on where you're from, but it's a given in this part of the country, as was the willingness to share what was needed to help. Still, I couldn't help but sense that Divine intervention was protecting us from my lack of preparation.

You might think I'm silly to view it that way, and that's fine. I still find it interesting to note that a few minutes after our bike was safely parked in our garage that the front tire went completely flat.

"The Village" Idiot

If you want to know what Michael Moore has done in "Fahrenheit 9/11" without actually giving him your money, go see "The Village."

Writer and director M. Night Shyamalan has fabricated a film that is intellectually and emotionally dishonest, at its core, and has done so with a clever and gifted hand that toys with the audience, sometimes letting it in on the joke but most often being intentionally obscure. End the end, the joke is on us, in that the obscurity is hiding nothing that we care about.

I can't tell you anything about the plot or the premise, both of which depend all too fragilely upon the innocence of the viewer. The bright spot of the film is Bryce Dallas Howard, who is often mesmerizing as a blind-but-sighted (if you know what I mean) young woman. She's Ron Howard's daughter, of course, and the resemblance to her more famous father is striking. But Ron would never have made a movie like this.

I had hoped for so much more from Shyamalan, one of my favorite directors, and the feeling that he was sitting in the back of the theater snickering at us made it all the more disappointing.

Eden's England Escape

My blogger friend Dawn Eden has left on a "Chesterton Pilgrimage," a 10-day tour of England led by American Chesterton Society president Dale Ahlquist. This is Dawn's first extended vacation in six years and I suspect that she'll return with some fascinating stories.

In the meantime, her blog layeth not fallow, as she has invited her mom and stepdad to fill in as guest bloggers. They've agreed to do so, and you should see what they're sharing with us: nothing less than their life stories! Each day, we get to see a glimpse into the pasts of a couple of very talented, intelligent and articulate people who, like Dawn, are Jews who claim Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. It makes for compelling reading, painfully so in places; you'd do well to check it out.

I am somewhat concerned that Dawn doesn't quite have the hang of this vacation thing, though. In today's update (no permalink), she is reported to have been pleased to find that the Continental Airlines flight to England provided reading material in the form of "The Weekly Standard" and "The National Review." Well, whatever sparks your plug, but for me, a transcontinental flight enroute to a 10-day vacation is the perfect time to break out a tawdry paperback novel, preferably of the sci-fi or punk-hacker genre. Perhaps Dawn feels the need to stay sharp around her fellow GKC pilgrims.

487-2398

No, the subject line is not a phone number...but it is a quiz, albeit a rather easy one.

Rob over at Snippets has returned to blogging after a month-long sabbatical, and he's uncovered a wonderful site called Word Count. This website shows the most commonly used 88,600 words in an unusual graphic format, ranked by their frequency of use. From the site:

WordCount is singularly British, and thus is sadly lacking in some of the more important vocabulary of Texas. I could find no reference to "ya'll," "fajita'" or even "honcho." And, really, when was the last time you used the word "lorry" (#5766) in a sentence, other than as a misspelling of the country singer's name? Nevertheless, it's great fun for anyone who enjoys wordplay. Rob has suggested a couple of ways to use the site in "games" mode; use your imagination and you'll find yourself wasting copious amounts of time chasing down trivia that only a blogger could love.

Rain and Its Strange Bounty

I'm not really trying to turn the Gazette into a photoblog, but I have to share a picture that shows a different side of our environment than we're accustomed to seeing.

As Abbye and I were taking our morning constitutional, I noticed three delicate... somethings... growing in the corner of a lawn. I returned a few minutes later with a camera. I wanted to capture their image before they become victims to a lawn mower.

I apologize for the lack of sharpness; my digicam doesn't excel in macro mode, or, perhaps, its owner doesn't. The "blooms" are penny-sized in diameter, and sit atop a thin 1" stalk that appears succulent in nature.

I have no idea what these "flowers" are. The first thing that came to my mind is their strong resemblance to the tiny invertebrates that inhabit coral reefs in the Caribbean. I suspect they are some form of fungus and have sprung up due to the abnormally wet weather we've had lately. If any of my local readers can identify them, please do so in the comments.

More Abbye Pics (If You're Lucky!)

I've added four new Abbye photos to the display at right. These images are from her early period, when she was still sorting out just who, exactly, was in charge. (That question was answered quite some time ago, by the way.)

Of course, since the photos are displayed in random fashion, you've got a 1-in-26 chance of seeing a new one. So keep hitting that reload button!

Wildlife in West Texas

I don't think I've yet shared with you some photos from a camping trip to Fort Davis, Texas. I had almost forgotten about them, as they are about six years old, but they came to mind for some reason over the weekend and I tracked them down.

We were staying in my parents' trailer at a campsite in the Davis Mountains State Park. Each afternoon and evening a parade of wildlife would come down from the surrounding hills and migrate through the park, looking for handouts. My dad was an easy mark, with his bucket of corn brought for just such purpose. We sometimes got more than we bargained for, as you can see below.

At one point, we looked out the window to see a herd of 12-15 javelinas (aka "Collared Peccary") noisily chowing down on the corn scattered in our "back yard."

Javelinas are so ugly that they're almost cute.

They're not exactly the intellectuals of the animal kingdom, however. This one was trying to figure out how to get at a few kernels of corn on the picnic tabletop. He never succeeded.

Other visitors to the campsite included racoon, skunk and deer. This is a great shot of a deer trying to figure out what manner of creature Abbye is. I'm not sure what Abbye is focusing on, or whether she'd even noticed that the deer had wandered up. She was intrigued by the deer, sitting motionless except for a quivering nose, watching them forage. She never tried to chase them...until they ran, at which time she quickly realized the futility of the effort.

There's a scary footnote to these photos. At one point, I looked up to see Abbye staring face-to-face with a large javelina. They were approximately the same distance from each other as shown in the preceding photo. However, I didn't grab the camera for that scene; I grabbed her leash and rudely (in her opinion) jerked her back to safety. My experiences with javelina have always been relatively benign, but they can exhibit nasty tempers, especially when their progeny are present. I wasn't taking any chances.

If you want to see a few additional photos, visit this page; it's not linked anywhere else.

GOOG It Is

Google has just announced that it will use the palindromic "GOOG" as its stock symbol. It also expects its upcoming IPO to fetch $108-$135/share, raising as much as $3.3 billion.

For those of you who entered the Gazette's "Name That IPO" contest, tough luck, as the winner is, um, me. Wallace gets credit for good judgment in following my lead, but loses points for creativity.

We'll award a special prize to Rachel for her guess of "GGLE," as that's what the Google execs will be doing all the way to the bank after the IPO.

Blog-Free Weekend

No blogging at the Gazette until Monday...family obligations take priority. Have a great weekend, and check out some of the quality postage from the folks listed on the right side of this page.

TDF Update - Stage 17: Fresh Out of Adjectives

OK, I give up. If you have any unused superlatives we can apply to Lance Armstrong and his USPS teammates, please send 'em along, because nothing I have comes close to describing reality.

Lance won a third straight stage of the Tour de France today, nipping an incredulous Andreas Kloden at the line. Kloden had jumped out in front of the small group consisting of the top five overall riders (plus hero-of-the-day Postie rider Floyd Landis) and seemed a lock for the stage win until Lance found another gear -- physically and psychologically -- and closed the gap mere feet from the finish line.

Lance didn't necessarily want or need the stage win; he really wanted Landis to get it, but Floyd left everything on the last climb helping Lance and the other top riders blow the rest of the peloton off the course. Lance figured that if he couldn't give Landis the win, he'd take it himself.

Lance is now ahead of Ivan Basso by 4'09" and will increase that gap before the finish in Paris on Sunday. He's also setting a new fashion standard: yellow is the new black, to match his cycling socks and, of course, wristband.

Find a Wall, Show a Movie

I've never really grasped the concept of the "flash mob," but here's an idea I think I can get behind: "Guerilla Drive-In."

Like most great ideas, it's really simple. Get a projector and a DVD, then find a blank wall and -- huzzah! -- you have a drive-in theater. (For you young whippersnappers out there, a drive-in movie theater was one in which you, um, drove in and watched the movie [or didn't...wink, wink] from the naugahyde comfort of your own car. You can research the historical records here.) If you want to get fancy, add an FM transmitter and invite some friends to watch from the Corinthian leather comfort of their own cars.

Deb over at Write Lightning brought this concept to my attention and she raises some good questions about the proper use of public property. Me, I'm wondering if we could get away with a Ronald Reagan film projected against the side of a movie theater showing "Fahrenheit 9/11"!

TDF Update - Stage 16: Bring on the Pain (Bring on the Yellow)

Lance has now beat every competitor in the Tour de France like red-headed stepchildren, in every conceivable way: with his team, in mano-a-mano sprints and now in the most painful of cycling events, the individual time trial.

The time trial is hard enough on a flat course, but it's hell on wheels when you're climbing 1100 meters over 15.5 kilometers, an inclince that averages around 8%. Lance was the only rider to break 40 minutes on this course up L'Alpe de Huez. In doing so, he caught up to and passed the overall second place rider, Ivan Basso, who started two minutes ahead of him. Basso is now almost four minutes behind Armstrong, and his performance dramatically illustrated the difference between hanging onto the wheel of another rider over a long road course, and doing it all on your own.

How hard is today's course? Armstrong averaged less than 15 mph in winning the stage. Compare that to his overall race average thus far of around 25 mph.

It's pretty simple, really. Lance can stand the pain. I think Lance embraces the pain. As he's said before, hurting on the bike is nothing compared to being cooked from the inside out by chemo treatments. The other riders feel the pain and try to overcome it; Lance grabs hold of it and bends it to his will.

The pressure of the race now shifts to the shoulders of Lance's teammates, who have the responsibility of protecting him through some still quite difficult stages.

TDF Trivia: What do those sponsors do?

Ever wonder what lines of work those Tour de France team sponsors are in? Me neither, but here's an article that will inform you nonetheless.

Actually, it's mildly interesting to consider that most of the sponsors are in relatively boring businesses (insurance, banking, flooring, consumer credit, etc.) and the fact that they are investing millions of euros in sponsorship gives you an idea of the prestige the race carries on the other side of the Big Pond.

The article also speaks to the Discovery Channel's taking over sponsorship of The Team To Be Formerly Known As The Posties, reportedly to the tune of $10 mil per year for the next three years.

Now, the Discovery Channel is a sibling channel to The Learning Channel, which leads to many intriguing promotional alternatives for the cycling team. For example, will we see Lance and main squeeze Sheryl Crow face off against Jan Ullrich and his sweetie in an episode of "Trading Spaces"? Will the team be gifted with a fashion makeover by the hosts of "What Not to Wear" ("oh, bubby...that lycra is just so 2001!")?

Tip of the chapeau to Tour de France 2004 for the link (but don't blame 'em for the lame commentary).

Bible Haiku: Psalms

OK, so we had a bit of a sabbatical from our Bible haiku meme, but it's time to get back on it, because we've got a long way to go.

To refresh your memory, we kicked this off last April, and in just a few weeks had haikus summarizing each book of the Bible through Job. The complete list to-date is found here.

I'm not particularly obsessed about adhering to the original rules of the meme. If you want to submit a haiku for inclusion on our list, either email it to me, put it in the comment section here, or post it to your blog and ping any of the Gazette's posts -- I'll find it. Keep in mind that you can submit a poem for a book that's already been done, if you feel so led.

I'm currently in the book of Psalms in my RTBTIAY regimen, so it's easy to focus on these praise and worship songs. What's less easy is distilling the longest book of the Bible into a handful of words, but here's my offering:

Proverbs, anyone?

Blogger Kudos

Kudos to Bryan over at Arguing With Signposts. Bryan just noticed that he's now officially a "Large Mammal" in the Truth Laid Bare Ecosystem (which, for you non-bloggers, is a semi-quasi-pseudo-official system for tracking the popularity of blogs). As of this moment, Bryan's blog is ranked #737 out of 12,890 total blogs listed in the Ecosystem, putting him in the top 6% of bloggers...no mean feat.

Bryan's blog was one of the first I latched onto when I started blogging and it remains one of my daily stops. He also took the time to give me some much appreciated encouragement early on, and was one of the folks who talked me out of bailing from the blogosphere during a down period. He's the only hockey-playing Baptist journalism professor with a tattoo I know, and that combination is bound to give him a unique perspective on life.

Way to go, amigo!

Planned Parenthood's Worst Nightmare Strikes Again

So, you think that Planned Parenthood is getting a bum rap? Sure, their "all abortion, all the time" airplay is a little icky, but, really, that's only a small part of what they stand for, right? I mean, they're doing their dead level best to educate kids so that those inconvenient pregnancies don't happen in the first place, and that's got to be good, right? C'mon...let's give credit where credit's due.

Well, what say let's credit them for encouraging teens to partake in pornography. Although that hardly rises to the level of killing babies, it's really hard to argue the validity of that strategy in polite company. Gee, wonder what else they're up to down there at Sangerland?

Don't take my word for it; just jump over and read Dawn Eden's latest salvo against the organization that perfected the art of doublespeak.

TDF Update: Stage 15 - Jan puts Armstrong into Yellow

It was fitting that Lance Armstrong would assume the overall lead of the Tour de France by winning stage 15, edging out his strongest overall rivals, Ivan Basso and Jan Ullrich, who finished second and third, respectively. Basso now sits in second place overall, 1 min. 25 sec. behind Lance. Ullrich is in fifth place, still almost 7 minutes behind the yellow jersey.

Ironically, it was an Ullrich-led breakaway early in the stage that split the field and allowed Lance & Co. to bury Thomas Voeckler, who had worn the yellow jersey for the previous 10 stages. Was Ullrich's move an act of desperation, or a sign that he's not giving up so easily? Regardless of his motive, the result was simply to put an exclamation point on Armstrong's claim of a sixth overall victory.

It's now very simple, in my opinion. There is no rider-related factor* that will keep Lance from winning this race. Period. He has the legs, the team and the strategy, and everyone else is riding for second place. To paraphrase a great philosopher of our day, I pity the fool who tries to outride Lance for the overall victory.

An interesting footnote is that the actor Robin Williams was in the USPS team car during today's stage. Williams is an avid bike rider and big supporter of the Posties. As Lance pointed out, Williams' presence must have been a bit distracting to USPS team director Johan Bruyneel. I can just hear him yelling out the window, "gooooood morning, Valréas!!!!"

*Obligatory weasel words: This being the Tour de France, it's dangerously foolish to discount the possibility of equipment failure, illness or spectator interference affecting the race's outcome.

Why I Like Baseball

I'll admit right up front that I don't have the patience to sit through a televised baseball game, unless it's the World Series and a team I care about is playing (which hasn't happened in a while). There's way too much inaction for my tastes.

Nevertheless, baseball is one of my favorite sports because of all the statistical trivia it generates. Significant numbers of books, websites, spreadsheets and sports bar bets have been created to quantify every conceivable aspect of a game that has, frankly, an embarrasing wealth of aspects.

These quantifications appeal to my inner accountant, so while I won't commit the time to actually watch a game, I'm endlessly intrigued by the fact that if I need to know what left-handed pitcher has the best ERA in games played on days beginning with the letter "s" in cities beginning with the letter "n," there's more than likely someone who can answer that question.

Take the following blurb from today's sports section, for example. It was ensconced in a routine report about how the Detroit Tigers beat the New York Yankees last night (a feat that in itself probably warrants some statistical flag waving). In an offhand manner, the article reports that Detroit thus improved its record to 44-47. Big whoop, right? Well, yes, actually...

I gotta love a game that inspires enough rabid loyalty (not to mention hardcore database programming) to generate stats like that!

TDF Update: Stage 13

Sometimes I'm so good, I scare myself. OK, it's not like you have to be Nostradamus to predict the likelihood of today's stage of the Tour de France turning out like it did.

Today's stage was almost a carbon copy of yesterday's, with the main difference being that Lance outsprinted Ivan Basso for the win. But everything else was pretty much the same: all the Big Guns lost Big Time to Lance, and his new rivals are hanging in there. Thomas Voeckler continues to amaze, as he was dropped on every climb and yet fought his way back each time. He still wears the yellow jersey, and should do so through tomorrow's flat stage and Monday's rest day. However, his 22 second advantage over Lance won't survive Tuesday's mountain stage, which will give Lance the coveted final starting position in Wednesday's vertical time trial.

However...

I'm curious if Team USPS is scrambling, trying to create a strategy to deal with the unexpected new rivals. See, they spent their prep time focusing on Ullrich, Hamilton, Heras, Mayo. They learned their tendencies, their strengths and weaknesses...just like a football team scouting likely playoff opponents. But, none of those riders are now serious threats, and the threats are now from riders which were likely never on the UPSP radar screen.

No one could have predicted that Voeckler could hang in the mountains like he has. Basso is a great rider, but his presence on Lance's rear wheel at this point has got to be a surprise.

The thing is, this makes stages like tomorrow's somewhat more dangerous than usual, from Lance's perspective. Normally, this would be almost like a rest day: a flat stage leading up to a day off. Usually, nobody will rock the boat. But now, Voeckler could decide that he's got nothing to lose, and could try to pull off a big breakaway. Lance's team will then have to decide whether to chase, or let him have the minutes and count on getting them back next week. But he's a wild card, and getting back those minutes may no longer be a slam dunk.

I still think Lance is almost sure to win this race. Next Wednesday's time trial might be the most exciting stage of the Tour in many years. One thing's for sure, this race is not unfolding like the "experts" predicted. Fortunately for you, I'm not an expert!

Best Spokes...um...things

With a nod to Bryan over at Spare Change, and his recurring meme called the Top 5ive, I've come up with my top five non-living* commercial pitchthings. Feel free to add your own, without feeling limited by Bryan's incomprehensible rules for doing so.

1. The Geico gecko


2. The Serta sleep sheep


3. The California Raisins


4. The NHTSA's Crash Test Dummies (Vince & Larry)


5. The Travelocity Gnome

Honorable mention goes to Catherine Zeta-Jones, whose low-energy pitches for T-Mobile more than qualify her. She's just not quite entertaining enough to crack the top 5.

*I apologize to those of you who are just now finding out that these spokescreatures are not, in fact, alive. To be honest, it was a shock to me, as well.

Happy Anniversary to Write Lightning!

Distracted as I was by preparations for my own wedding anniversary, I missed Deb's announcement of Write Lightning's one year anniversary last Tuesday.

Congratulations, Deb...count me as a big fan!

TDF Update: Stage 12

OK, so Lance made a move today and now sits in 2nd place overall in the Tour de France, five minutes and change behind Thomas Voeckler (who may well be The Next Lance, but not this year). But my question is this: what price did he pay?

Stage 13 tomorrow is a killer, with seven categorized climbs...well, six, if you consider that the final one of the day is 16 km at an 8% grade and is actually beyond categorization. Oh, and it comes after 188 km of racing.

Lance's effort today wore out most of the riders who were considered his main rivals coming into the TDF: Ullrich, Hamilton, Heras...but it also wore out his own stable of protective climbers. Can they recover enough to pace him in similar fashion tomorrow?

And, how much did Lance himself leave on the mountain in finishing second in today's stage? He was outsprinted by Italian Ivan Basso, and even though no one will argue that Lance needed to win the stage, it's also hard to argue against the psychological advantage of his doing so, not to mention the 20 second time bonus he would have picked up. As usual, though, he gave no sign of what was going through his head.

I think the tone of this race is shifting -- has shifted -- with Lance's chief rivals now being riders who weren't previously considered as contenders: Basso, Kloden (who may displace Ullrich as The Man on Team T-Mobile), Sastre.

It's a cliché, but there's still a lot of racing left. But I can't help thinking that tomorrow is a watershed stage for Lance. If he does tomorrow what he did today, you can start cashing #6.

A Hilarious Duet

If you're one of the three or four people in the world who haven't yet viewed the cartoon duet of Bush and Kerry singing "This Land is My Land," well...good luck. JibJab's servers are, in their words, "getting slammed."

Keep clicking, though. It's worth the wait, and guaranteed to offend folks on both sides of the aisle. [Adult language warning, but still laugh-out-loud funny.]

This campaign could use more of this stuff, you know?

My! Robot

OK, so I'm not a headline writer ala Dawn Eden but the point is that "I, Robot" is a quite excellent movie and I recommend it highly to any (1) sci-fi fans, (2) Will Smith fans and (3) action movie genre fans.

This is the first movie I can recall where Smith displays a truly wide range of acting skills. I've always respected his ability as a comedic/action guy, but he's pushing the envelope and doing so quite well.

The script respects the viewer, requiring you to fill in a few blanks here and there. It's not a epic intellectual exercise, by any stretch of the imagination, but neither is it a "Chronicles of Riddick."

It's also not a literal remake of Isaac Asimov's classic collection of short stories with the same name. It's been many years since I've read those stories, but the movie made the potential complications of Asimov's "Three Laws of Robotics" come to life in ways my imagination never did.

My favorite movies are those which introduce me to characters I care about, and which (intentionally) make me laugh while still challenging my imagination. "I, Robot" succeeds on every level.

From a sci-fi perspective, almost everything rang true, although I will quibble with the decision to use the term "nanites" (which sounds like a clan from one of the tribes of Israel) in place of the more commonly-seen "nanobots," and I had to wonder if the set for the climactic scene was borrowed from a Star Wars movie. At one point, I channeled "The Terminator" (but never saw the twist coming that changed the whole direction of the plot...if you see the movie, you'll know what I mean).

I left the theater with only one question: just how much did Audi pay for its very prominent product placement?

For my money, "I, Robot" is one of the best movies of the year.

Did you see any ID?

A man claiming to be President George W. Bush signed into law today a tough new bill designed to fight the growing problem of identity theft.

Three Decades and a Year

Thirty one years ago on this date, the woman whom God set aside for me before laying the foundations of the universe became my wife, thereby making me a complete, if yet unfinished man.

Subjecting our marriage to my usual accountant's analysis is not a wise thing, for it brings into too sharp focus the illogic mystery that is love. She is so many things that I am not: patient, gentle, winsomely naive, slow to anger, merciful. Sometimes I think that I am her cross to bear, and the fact that she loves me anyway is a testament to the grace of God.

She is the only woman I've ever known, and I can't imagine life without her. I thank God for her every day, and pray that, for her sake, He'll make me a better man.

Google Goes NASDAQ: Let's Have a Contest!

Google announced today that its stock shares will be traded on the techcentric NASDAQ, instead of the slightly-more-prestigious NYSE. However, the company has not yet announced its planned stock symbol.

And therein lies the inspiration for a new Gazette contest: what's your guess as to Google's stock symbol?

"SE" (for "Search Engine") is already taken by 7-Eleven, Inc.

My vote is for "SEEK," which is apparently available as of this writing. But "GOOG" would probably make more sense from a corporate identity perspective (it's not just about searching anymore, you know), and it's available, as is the more ambiguous "GOO."

Leave your guesses in the comments and if you're right, you'll have the undying adoration of some MBAs, somewhere.

TDF: One Other Thing

I forgot to mention this in my earlier TDF entry: I'm quite impressed with the number of riders and support crew members who are wearing the yellow wristbands of the Lance Armstrong Foundation. During today's stage, there was a scene of a crew member leaning out the team car window to give a rider a quick neck massage (which, at 40 kph, was interesting in itself); the crew member was wearing one of the bright yellow bands.

The TV shots of the peloton catch numerous similar flashes of yellow on riders of all nationalities and teams. I suspect that Lance's popularity with the other riders, and the worthiness of the cause, make these gestures off support easy for the riders to display.

Say, you might want to do the same! ;-)

Blogathon 2004 - Not

I just discovered that the Blogathon fund-raiser will not be held this year (I'm just four months late in getting up to speed), but will return in 2005. The event sponsors promise something bigger and better than ever, so if you're a blogger, start thinking about two things: (1) which worthy cause you'll blog on behalf of, and (2) what you'll blog about for 24 consecutive hours.

I hope the Gazette is still enough fun that I'll be up (literally) for this event next summer.

In the meantime, Project Blog is stepping into the gap this summer. As of today, 120 bloggers have signed up for this 24-hour event, which will take place on July 24. Pop over to the blogger list and if you see one you recognize and like, consider making a pledge. My interpretation of this project is that this is a one-time effort, and not intended to be a long-term Blogathon competitor.

King Arthur

MLB and I caught a matinee showing of "King Arthur" this afternoon. The reviews we'd read hadn't been exactly glowing, so we didn't go in with high expectations. As a result, we were pleasantly surprised, enjoying a very interesting and entertaining telling of a familiar story from an unfamiliar perspective.

This movie won't win any Oscars, but it's not as bad as some reviewers have made it out to be. I didn't think the plot was a mess, and the subplot of the papal influence emanating from Rome was a variation on the King Arthur story that I'd never before heard.

As usual, here are a few of my less insightful observations about this movie, with no spoilers:

• That wise philosopher and world-traveler, Roy O'Bannon once commented about England, "this country blows," because of the inclement weather (among other things). "King Arthur" does a great job of reinforcing that climatological perception.


• Keira Knightley, the new Wynona Ryder (hopefully with less sticky fingers) will undoubtedly win the award for Most Obviously Uncomfortable Costume in a Supporting (heh) Role. But, she makes a most fetching Woad.


• Unlike in most King Arthur-era movies, there's no glamorization of the lifestyle. There's no shining armor, but there's lots of stringy hair and sleeping on the ground. Actually, the group reminds me more of the (anti)heroes in movies like "The Wild Bunch" or "The Dirty Dozen."


• Remember the over-the-top portrayal of Merlin by Nicol Williamson in Excalibur? From that perspective, Stephen Dillane's character in "King Arthur" is the anti-Merlin. He looks (and acts, at time) more like a homeless guy from Houston than a great wizard.


• Some people will disagree, but the remarkable absence of gore didn't hurt the movie, in my opinion. The violence was mostly implied, making the PG-13 rating pretty accurate. If you're hoping for decapitations and disembowelments, you'll have to wait for "AVP."


• The characters' accents were all over the map, which was a bit disconcerting. Stellan Skarsgård played the head Saxon -- the baaaaaad guy. Stellan is Swedish, but I swear his accent was Californian. His son sounded Transylvanian. Guinevere/Keira had a very refined British accent for a Woad; the rest of the Woads spoke some sort of unintelligible dialect.


• Boy, for denizens of the Dark Ages, most of those folks sure had purty teeth!

I'd still give "King Arthur" three ants (out of five).

TDF Stage 7: Smooth...and time for some trivia

Today's leg of the Tour de France was a nice contrast to previous stages, as there were no major crashes (well, try telling that to Swen Montgomery, a Swiss rider who hit the pavement hard enough to apparently break a collarbone, forcing him to withdraw), and no threats to any of the top riders.

Tomorrow's stage has a category 3 climb and three cat 4 climbs (the lower the number, the harder the climb; there are a few - like l'Alpe d'Huez, stage 16's route for the individual time trial - which are beyond classification), and we could see some shuffling at the top. There could be a little more willingness to expend more energy than usual, since Monday is a rest day.

Without a lot of excitement on the road today, my accountant's gene kicked in and I did a quick 'n dirty analysis of some team-specific details*. The following isn't likely to be of much interest to anyone but a hardcore cycling fan (if even then), but I found some of this stuff pretty intriguing:

• Of the 21 teams in the Tour, 11 are riding bikes equipped with Campagnolo components, and the other 10 are using Shimano components. I don't know the breakdown for previous years, but I suspect that 10 years ago, the split was probably 90/10 or higher in favor of Campy.


• 13 teams are using bikes which are built in their home countries. The 21 teams are using bikes from 18 different manufacturers, with only Decathlon, Look and Time being used by more than one team. Interestingly, each of those brands are French.


• Three teams are using US-made bikes: USPS-Berry Floor is using Trek, of course. Two Italian teams, Saeco and Domina Vacanze are riding Cannondales and Specialized, respectively.


• French-made bikes are used by 7 teams, Italian bikes by 5, and Spanish bikes by 3 teams. Bikes from Swiss (BMC), Taiwanese (Giant) and Belgian (Eddy Merckx) companies are being ridden by one team each.


• There's a wide range of financial backing for the teams in the Tour, ranging from an annual budget of $3.6M for the Italian team of Alessio-Bianchi to $14.4M for the German T-Mobile team. The Posties have the 7th-highest budget, at 9.0M.


• However, much to the chagrin of the sponsors, I'm sure, the amount of money doesn't necessarily correspond to team success. For example, Alessio-Bianchi is in 2nd place after Stage 7, despite having the lowest budget. Team CSC is at #1, yet they have a lower budget than 16 other teams. On the other end of the spectrum, the third highest budget ($9.6M) belongs to Gerolsteiner, and the German team is sitting in 15th position. Granted, these standings will probably change significantly by the end of the race, and it will be interesting to see if the final standings reflect the finances.

All data were taken from the VeloNews website.

TDF Stage 6: Ride Fast, Crash Hard

I had a hard time getting motivated to post anything about today's stage in the Tour de France. As I predicted yesterday, nothing major happened. There's was the usual small breakaway that lasted up until the final kilometer, at which point about half the peloton crashed because the guy they chased down was too pooped to ride as fast as everyone else.

Lance was among the crashees (giving him a two-fer; he also went down early in the stage), but lost no time due to one of the scores of relatively obscure TDF rules that provides for no loss of time if an accident occurs within one kilometer of the finish.

I do know from first-hand experience that falling off your bicycle will yield some residual soreness in subsequent days, so Lance can't be happy about these accidents. I think everyone in the race is beginning to weary of the frequency with which the accidents are happening, and yet there's not any specific cause that can be identified and addressed (although Armstrong does seem to think that the sprinters are acting dangerously at the end of the races...but, hey, that's their thing, you know?).

Tomorrow's stage is again relatively flat, but with a lot more rolling hills than the past two days, including two rated climbs. Each day thereafter appears to get a little more mountainous, so look for the non-climbers in the group who want to solidify their standings to try to do so tomorrow.

Look for Lance to try to keep the rubber side down.

Serendipitous Traffic

I suppose everyone's heard by now about the cleaning lady in Massachusetts who is claiming that $294 million lottery prize. Her winnings have yielded an unexpected windfall for the Gazette, as well, in the form of a bunch of new visitors.

Apparently, the mention in news reports of Jack Whitaker's record $314.9 million Powerball prize in 2002 has brought renewed interest in tracking him down (to ask for a loan, no doubt), and the googlers are ending up here in droves due to this post.

I can't decide if it's more prestigious to be fifth on Google for "Jack Whitaker lottery" or first for "Texas Barbie." I guess since the latter got Scott all worked up, and you don't really want to get crossways with him, I'll opt for basking in the temporary glow of untold numbers of really greedy people.

Life is Good!

OK, I'm officially pumped.

Part of my euphoria is directly related to the sugar rush from the recent consumption of an "Aunt Sally's Original Creole Praline" (hand delivered to me by a friend who spent last week in New Orleans). Take that, Dr. Atkins!

Another contributing factor is that I successfully installed and fired-up mySQL on my PowerBook and I can now (theoretically) create and test database-driven websites anyplace I can carry my laptop. Is that geek heaven or what?

Also, Jasmine made it home safely last night, after almost two months in Asia. I'm looking forward to hearing more about her adventures, and I hope she'll be sharing some of them with you via the Gazette. (She's got about a zillion things to attend to right now, I'm sure, so give her a little settling-down time.)

And, finally, it's Friday afternoon and I've already mowed the lawn. I can't think of anything that might improve things, except for...yes, there it is...a little dog that just ambled up for some ear scratching.

Life is good.

A Tale of Two Abbyes

I think I may have mentioned previously that our little dog is easily spooked. Well, that's putting it mildly. If the wind is blowing more than 10 mph, she will not go outside unless coerced, for fear that a rogue leaf will blow her direction, causing untold devastation.

Just today at lunch, I witnessed another display of her amazing lack of bravery. We had received a package via UPS and the contents were cushioned by the ubiquitous styrofoam peanuts. During the unpacking process, a sliver of styrofoam -- smaller than a baby aspirin -- escaped unnoticed onto the tile floor of our dining room. I finished my lunch and Abbye wandered in for her traditional post-meal treat (she doesn't beg; she just knows her due). I gave it to her, she scarfed it down, then turned her attention to her food bowl ("gack...dog food again! When will they ever learn?") and the surrounding floor.

She was nosing around when suddenly she yelped, jumped up in the air and ran to the other side of the room. I looked down, trying to find the cause of her consternation, and all I saw was the tiny piece of styrofoam. She re-approached it with the caution usually reserved for lighted sticks of dynamite and I realized what had happened.

She had gotten within a few inches of the styrofoam when static electricity caused the pellet to jump off the floor and directly onto her nose. I'm surprised that she didn't spend the rest of the day under the bed, lest she suffer another unprovoked attack.

But, to her credit, she's not always such a wuss. A while back, we were returning from our morning walk and were passing by our neighbor's yard just as his sprinkler system was coming on. There's a row of sprinkler heads next to the sidewalk, and as luck would have it, Abbye was next to one when the soft hissing occurred that presages the rush of water into the nozzle. I had just enough time to turn around, realize what was about to happen, and see her stick her nose into the hole from which the sprinkler head would emerge.

I waited for the inevitable clamor...and it never came! She was startled when the sprinkler head popped up into her face, but she didn't make a sound. She merely stepped back and continued down the sidewalk as if nothing had happened, although it was difficult to ignore her dripping muzzle and impossible to keep from laughing out loud at her apparent nonchalance.

The 10 Commandments of Church Websites

I've been asked to do a presentation at an upcoming regional Sunday School Conference hosted by our church. This annual conference gives smaller churches throughout the area the opportunity to get some hands-on development and training that they wouldn't be able to otherwise afford or attract.

My topic is pretty general: "Church Websites 101." It's supposed to be a quick primer for churches that don't yet have websites, or that have neglected sites they want to improve. I'm thinking about adapting a presentation I did about a year ago in another venue, entitled "The 10 Commandments of Church Websites." The attendees will be mostly pastors and education ministers.

Here are the 10 main points (TSN - Thou Shalt Not; TS - Thou Shalt; we're using the KJV for this purpose):

1. TSN: Covet thy neighbor’s bandwidth [keep page size small]


2. TSN: Write for the web like thou write thy sermons [avoid text-heavy pages]


3. TS: Know thy audience [who's your target?]


4. TSN: Drive out the lost nor confuse the saved [avoid religious jargon and confusing navigation]


5. TSN: Forget the promotion of thy site [publicize your site...unless it's lousy]


6. TS: Remember the “poor and afflicted” [make it accessible]


7. TSN: Bring an ugly website into thy neighbor’s home [make it pretty]


8. TS: Remember the updates and keep them regular [make it timely]


9. TSN: Collect personal information without proper notice [respect visitor privacy]


10. TS: Make thy site an entrapment to search engines [make it SE friendly]

If you have any suggestions or tips for improving this list, I'd love to hear them. If I incorporate them, I'll even give you credit in the presentation, charitable soul that I am.

If we have time, I'll also present "The 7 Deadly Sins of Email." But that's for another post.

Update (7/9/04): Christopher posts his list of things to avoid in your church website over at Spare Change.

"And while you're at it, do something about those dang employees!"

Here's a fascinating glimpse into the manifestation of corporate paranoia:

At last count there were about 18 zillion of these devices floating around. It's a tad late to be sounding the alarm now, don't you think? Plus, while you're at it, maybe you should also ban PDAs, cell phones, photocopiers, pencils and paper and employees with the ability to remember details for longer than their coffee breaks.

Another "Single Issue Voter"?

I don't want to put words in her mouth – or marks on her ballot – but it appears that the scintillating Dawn Eden is perilously close to joining the ranks of the Single Issue Voters.

Just follow the light, kiddo...just follow The Light!

TDF Stage 5: Boredom and Terror

Rain. Wind. Cold. How would you like to ride 120 miles in those conditions? Me neither; it was bad enough just watching it on OLN-TV (which, by the way, apparently has only about eight commercials in rotation during its Tour de France coverage).

A five-man breakaway started early in the race and was never reeled in; the peloton lost about 13 minutes as a result, giving French rider Thomas Voeckler the yellow jersey after stage 5. The USPS team seemed content to ride conservatively, protecting Lance, in recognition of the fact that once the race hits the mountains, the minutes lost will be quickly regained. The only disconcerting note is the status of Postie rider Manuel Beltran, who fell at 102 kilometers; the last I heard he was seeking medical attention for an apparent injury to his arm. If Beltran is lost or disabled, that will be a blow to the strength of the USPS team.

The big story of this stage was, indeed, the crashes. In places, the pavement appeared to be coated with ice, judging by the way the riders skated and skidded across it. However, in a testimony to the adage that you make your own good luck, none of the top overall contenders got tangled in the accidents.

Oh, by the way, Aussie Stuart O'Grady won the stage.

Stage 6 is another long, flat (slightly downhill, in fact) route, 121 miles or so in length. Look for another conservative showing by the race leaders, although a breakaway by a darkhorse contender could wreak havoc with the organization of the peloton. At some point, you can no longer afford to give up 10+ minutes in a stage.

Another TDF Blog

Another blog following the Tour de France is the inventively named "Tour de France 2004". Lots of photos and peripheral quotes and stories add flavor to coverage of the race.

War Between the Tastes

[Heh. The post title reminds me of my favorite joke: Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who laid awake at night wondering if there really is a dog?]

This innocent post by your humble correspondent has apparently set off a series of skirmishes that threaten to escalate into a full-blown conflagration that could shake the foundation of the blogosphere to its very core...

Ahem. Sorry about that. I just noticed that the Drama Dial was pegged all the way to the right. Let me make a minor adjustment...OK...that should be better.

My objective reporting of the fact that Blue Bell Creamery has introduced a new flavor of ice cream containing Pecos cantaloupe has stirred the passions of bloggers Bryan at Arguing With Signposts and Mark at The Bemusement Park about which geographic regions of the US have better frozen confections and fruit. Bryan is a displaced Texan and Mark roams the wilds of Iowa. They each have staked out unyielding positions, leading one to believe that the only possible outcome will involve the term "scorched earth."

Frankly, I'm not up for this battle. For one thing, near as I can tell, Mark's credentials stem from something in the area of the preacherly persuasion, and I learned long ago that just as you do not engage a Sicilian in a battle of wits, you do not engage a preacher in an argument over food.

I also believe that Mark should reassess the wisdom of crossing blades with a hockey-playing Texan with a bad attitude about not being able to live in the state he loves.

I suggest a truce, with two provisions. First, all parties should acknowledge that any fool with a carton of Half-n-Half and a box of sugar can make ice cream that's to die for. Really, now...have you ever had a bad bowl of ice cream?

Second, all parties should acknowlege that fruit is as fruit does. I happen to believe that the peaches grown in the Hill Country around Fredericksburg, Texas, are among the best in the world, but, frankly, the absolute best peaches I ever ate came from a lone tree growing in my own backyard. That tree sacrificed its life to provide us with one bounteous, trunk-splitting harvest a dozen years ago, and we enjoyed the fruit in its memory for a couple of years thereafter.

However, I will admit that I can't let stand one statement made by Mark, and that's his dismissal of the Pecos cantaloupe, via oblique reference to what we call around these parts a muskmelon, a flavorless filler useful only for doorstops. In the spirit of conciliation, I'll assume that Mark has never sampled a true Pecos cantaloupe (one of the few varieties of fruit that is actually subject to counterfeiting) or its close cousin, the Coyonosa variety. That such a sweet and delectable offering should come from terrain and climate that makes the Mars landscape look like Bali is a true testament to the reality of God's grace.

Well, having thought about it further, I've changed my mind. Mark, you're absolutely right. Nothing can compare to the melons in your part of the country. They are perfection on earth, and you would just be disappointed by Pecos cantaloupe. My advice is to stay far, far away from them, and tell everyone you know to do the same. In fact, in the off-chance that you should actually encounter one, my further advice is to ship it to me immediately and I'll handle the disposal thereof. And if you find two of them, send one to Bryan.

TDF Stage 4: "Big Win, Small Gain"

I stole the post title from Chris Carmichael's analysis of today's Tour de France stage, the Team Time Trial. The USPS train team put on an awesome display of precision and power to blow away the rest of the teams and win today's stage by over a minute, a huge gap at this level of competition (only 39 seconds separated the next four teams).

However, because of the new rules this year, Lance & Co. was able to pick up only seconds over their main rivals. As Bryan over at Arguing With Signposts put it in a comment on the previous TDF report, this race should be renamed the "Tour Defeat Lance" as it seems that the route and the rules changes were chosen with the express purpose of working against his strengths. Up to this point, however, he's managed to cope very well and, in fact, now wears the yellow jersey as the overall race leader. His teammates also hold down the 2nd-5th places, with six of the Posties in the top 10 overall at this early point in the race.

That's not expected to last...Lance has bigger fish to fry than hanging onto the yellow jersey through meaningless intermediate stages, and if one of the lesser rivals wants it badly enough, he'll gladly concede it to keep from wearing out his team to defend it. His eye is still on Jan Ullrich and Tyler Hamilton.

Tomorrow's stage should be another fast one, relatively flat and 200 kilometers in length. Don't look for any shakeup in the placement of the main contenders.

Coffee Mate

I don't think I've mentioned that we have a new coffee maker. Actually, we've had it for a couple of months, but like any significant new relationship, there's a bit of a probationary period before you want to make a big deal of it in front of the whole world. But, I really think this is going to work out, so I'm introducing it to the family, so to speak.

It's a Cuisinart 12-cup carafe model, very sleek and very tall. It replaces a somewhat dumpier model from Philips, which also had a built-in grinder that we never used. The grinder was (a) ineffective and (b) a pain to clean, so we ditched it in favor of a burr grinder from Starbucks. The Cuisinart is grinderless, which means it can devote its full attention to its raison d'être: making really good coffee.

It has other qualities that the Philips model lacked, or lost over time. For one thing, it makes hot coffee...blow-before-you-sip, pre-McDonalds-lawsuit hot. The Philips model gave us very warm coffee, but that's not good enough. Also, the Cuisinart's carafe is wonderfully insulated and the last cup comes out almost as hot as the first, another area where the Philips model fell down. And, almost magically, you can pour coffee from the Cuisinart carafe without unscrewing the lid! Is this a great country or what?*

But most importantly, the Cuisinart is reliable. Near the end, when we walked into the kitchen each morning, we never knew whether the Philips coffee would be in the pot, or all over the countertop and floor. There's very little in life more aggravating than an incontinent coffee maker, IYKWIM.

I've applied my keen powers of observation (which seem to work only in really trivial situations) and determined that the key to finding a reliable carafe-style coffee maker is in the sturdiness of the carafe lid. The lid on a coffee carafe is a wonder of engineering skill, outfitted with myriad valves and channels and tubes and flanges and the like. It has to be, for the process of dumping a hot liquid into a cool closed container stirs up all kinds of thermodynamic reactions, the scope of which are well outside both this post and my comprehension. But what I do know (or believe) is that a girly kind of lid just won't stand up over time (and I mean no disrespect to the girlyish among my readers). The Philips lid was girly; the Cuisinart's is, by contrast, burly. The ball valve makes a healthy rattle when you shake it; the Philips' valve sort of tinkled. Over time, coffee-derived sludge gums up the works, and the more robust mechanisms are more easily kept clean.

I trust that you'll keep these factors in mind when the time comes to choose a new mate maker. Trust me, you'll both be happier for having done so.

TDF: Stage 3 - Cobblestones

The two sections of cobblestones in today's stage of the Tour de France proved the undoing of more than one rider, in more than one way. The crashes that were directly or indirectly related to the rough, narrow "pavé" yielded one broken collarbone (Marco Velo) and more than one bruised ego. None was hurt as badly from a psychological perspective than Spaniard Iban Mayo, considered by some as a legitimate contender for the podium at the end of the Tour. Unfortunately for him, he got tangled up in one of the crashes, was dropped by the lead pack and ended up losing almost 4 minutes...effectively ending any hope he has of winning the race. Even though his crash was not directly related to the cobblestones, their presence certainly played a factor in his group not being able to catch up to the lead pack.

The Big Guns (Armstrong, Ullrich, Hamilton, Heras) were better prepared (wider wheels and tires), smarter (riding hard to stay at the front of the peloton at the beginning of the cobbled sections) and luckier. That last factor is perhaps the most crucial, whether you believe in it or not.

In a 23-day race, over amazingly varied terrain and through all kinds of weather conditions, unexpected things can happen no matter how you try to anticipate them. You can optimize your odds with intelligence and money, but sometimes it just comes down to being in the right place at the right time. That's why this race is so fascinating to watch.

Tomorrow is the team time trial, a stage where in the past you might expect the USPS team to build big -- even insurmountable -- leads over some of its rivals. However, a rule change this year limits the amount of time a team can lose to just three minutes, somewhat reducing the importance of this stage. Nevertheless, watch for Lance's team to put on an awesome display of power and speed, with the likely result that Armstrong will be in yellow by the end of the day.

Barring, that is, any bad luck.

Moore's Film Redefines Genre

I read a report yesterday alerting us to the fact that "Fahrenheit 9/11" has smashed the all-time box office record for documentaries. It occurred to me that this movie has, indeed, redefined the genre. This came to me in a homemade-ice-cream-induced vision...

Reason #3,957 to Live in Texas

Blue Bell has just announced a new ice cream flavor: Cantaloupe. It's made with gen-u-wine Pecos cantaloupe* (the best in the universe...but, then, you knew that).

And it's available only in Texas. Yee-haw!

*The downside is that this will make 'em even harder to find than they already are.

Blogging on the 4th

Here's a great juxtaposition of technologies: I'm sitting in my front drive, blogging via a wireless connection while overseeing the creation of homemade ice cream in our 25 year old Sears, Roebuck & Company electric freezer. I suppose a more dramatic contrast would involve a hand-cranked freezer, but then I couldn't blog, so what's the point?

Abbye's laying next to my chair, ears folded back. She's a little skeptical of the grinding, twitching device. We don't make homemade ice cream often enough for her to be accustomed to it. (And she's really not happy when I have to bang around in the ice chest to break up the frozen clumps to add to the freezer. You just never know when that banging might be extended to adjacent dog-like creatures.)

It's a wonderful thing to contemplate...the simple pleasure of a hot July afternoon in Midland, Texas, America, with a dependable stream of electricity to power our luxuries, and the privilege of owning property upon which to house them.

We joined a few thousand of our friends and neighbors in downtown Midland last night for an early celebration of Independence Day. We listened to hip-hop, gospel stomp, Sousa and good old patriotic music, secular and sacred alike. The evening was beautiful, and listening to the gathered mass sing "God Bless America" and "The Star Spangled Banner" was inspiring. The fireworks were excellent (someone finally figured out that the prevailing winds are from the south, and positioned the display to our north, sparing us from the past years' usual smoke and spark fallout).

I suspect that there were hundreds, if not thousands, of similar celebrations repeated across the nation, and many of them undoubtedly had the same overtone as ours: we are blessed as a nation because a sovereign and holy God has chosen to do so. The remnant that understands this truth may be falling in number (I'm not convinced of that), but its dedication remains constant and I find tremendous comfort and encouragement in that realization.

God bless America. Indeed.

Dead in the H20

Not literally dead, of course...but posting, commenting, trackbacking, etceteraing is all but undoable thanks to my rapidly-declining-in-value webhost, ValueTech, Inc. To make matters worse, their online support site gives this message: "page contains no data."

I have no idea when the Gazette will be reliably back online. The fact that you're reading this means nothing, other than offering a tantalizing tease of what might be.

The silver lining is that the comment spammers are also stymied, so I've got that going for me.

Anyway, happy birthday, America!

Update: Well, apparently, the trick was to mention my host's name, thereby shaming it into fixing the problem. Wish I'd thought of it sooner...it appears we're back in bidness. Be afraid...be very afraid!

More Server Woes

My webhost is experiencing the [undiagnosed] server problems that plagued the Gazette a couple of months ago. If this gets posted, it will be after submitting it about 30 times. Same with leaving comments; you will eventually succeed, but it's probably not worth your time to try. I apologize for the lousy service. I wish I was in control of the situation, but I'm not.

TDF Prologue: Beginner's Luck

Imagine that you're a young professional bike racer. You're 23 years old, and you've been making money racing bicycles only three years. You've grown up watching -- from a distance -- legends and legends-to-be like Lance, Jan, Tyler.

Then, in 2004, you find yourself in the incredible position of being a member of a team entered in the greatest bicycling event in history: the Tour de France! You can scarcely sleep in the days leading up to today, the first day of the Tour. The Prologue is the shortest leg of the Tour, just over 6 kilometer...or about 7 minutes of riding. Riders start one minute apart, for three hours. You've ridden pretty well thus far during the season, and you've got a starting position in the upper half of the Tour pack. Still, 45 riders will start after you do...45 riders who are deemed to be stronger, faster, better than you. But this is the Tour, and you're in it for the first time, and your heartbeat is about 200 bpm as you wait at the top of the ramp for your start.

It arrives and you're lost in the ride. The thousands of spectators lining the route are barely perceived in your peripheral vision, and they don't enter at all into your mental state. There's nothing but you, the bike and the road for the next 6 minutes, 51 seconds, which you are amazed to see puts you in first place...for now. You settle in to watch the remaining riders, sure that one of them will knock you out of the top spot, but hoping against hope for a miracle. One by one, the riders cross the finish line, and each finisher is slower than you, and your hope begins to grow.

Finally, it's time for the reigning Tour champion and time trialer extraordinaire, Lance himself. You know that you've got a lock on second place, and that's incredible. Lance is only 2 seconds behind you at the split, and you also know that the best time trialers usually have negative splits...the second half is faster than the first. Lance is riding strongly, like the 5-time champion he is, and as he comes into view of the finish line, you sense that today is just not your day.

Incredibly, though, he falls short, officially just one second slower, and you begin to cry as it sinks in. You're Fabian Cancellara, from Switzerland, and you've just won the first stage of the Tour de France in your very first try. In fact, you'll wear the yellow jersey tomorrow as the overall tour leader...in your very first try. Regardless of what comes later, your place in cycling history is now secure.

Update: The Tour de France blog reports that Cancellara is the second man to win the opening stage in his first appearance. Brit Chris Boardman did it ten years ago.

Get all the official Tour de France details here. The Tour de France blog is also a great place for a recap of the major stories of the day.

Think You Know Texas?

Visit the link to this short quiz about Texana on Read My Lips. I missed one question (never was a huge Willie Nelson fan).

Scorpions and Spiders and Snakes, Oh My...

I've been meaning to address this all week and just lost track of time. On Monday, Deb Thompson over at Write Lightning wrote a very nice post wishing me a happy birthday, but expressing dismay over the arachnid references to one of my posts earlier in the day. She felt strongly enough about it, in fact, to also mention it in an email message.

Ironically, Deb and I share this particular phobia. I hate spiders; it's that simple. They're evil and icky and I'll destroy a room if that's what it takes to ensure the death of one on the loose. I could barely sit through "Arachnophobia" and when MLB bought it on DVD, I was forced to re-enroll in therapy. (Don't ask; it's a long and pitiful story.)

Nevertheless, they are a part of the west Texas landscape, as are scorpions, centipedes, millipedes and snakes, and at some point, one must figure out how to co-exist, however uneasy the truce may be. I've done that through the establishment of clear and inviolable boundaries. The rules are simple. The indoors are mine, and trespassors die. The outdoors are theirs, and they're free to do their worst, provided they can catch me.

This system has worked pretty well for decades and I don't expect it to change. And it's allowed me to exhibit a certain degree of objectivity when encountering these guys in the wild, such as cycling past the tarantulas which tend to emerge in droves following rainshowers, or the past the snakes (rattlers and otherwise) which sun themselves on the edge of the road in the morning hours.

When I encounter any of these creatures in the wild, I leave them alone. That's the deal. There's only one exception.

I still have memories of visiting a childhood friend on his ranch outside Fort Stockton during the summer. We were out in the "pasture"* with his dad looking for fossils and arrowheads, and our attention was drawn by a glimpse of movement next to a large flat rock that jutted out enough to provide a bit of shade for...something.

My friend's dad overturned the rock and we all jumped back at the sight of both a rattler and a centipede sharing that shelter. It was profoundly instructive to me that the rancher killed the centipede first.

*Note: The word "pasture" is used very loosely as it implies the presence of grass and other plant life. This description simply doesn't apply to much of the terrain around Fort Stockton, but the proper term eludes me. "Barren wasteland" comes to mind, but that seems a little dramatic for these purposes.

Tidy Spidey

Sorry about the hokey post title, but, really, it works: everything in Spiderman II just fits. Jared provides his usual insightful and well-written review of the movie (albeit without the catchy title ;-) over at Mysterium Tremendum, so I'll just provide some random observations about the movie. These will be more relevant to those who have seen the movie, but I don't consider any of them to be spoilers.

• J. K. Simmons really hits his stride as the irascible newspaper editor, J. Jonah Jameson. His role in II was somewhat expanded from the first movie, and he takes full advantage to show more mood changes than Anna Nicole Smith in front of a Twinkies display.


• Dr. Octopus (aka Doc Ock) makes a great villain, but the premise is just a tad short on believability <gasp!>. I mean, a good pair of welder's gloves would have worked just as well as his cyberorganonano arms to punch the buttons on the fusion generator control panel, and it really takes a lot of provocation to make welder's gloves take control of your mind. Not saying it can't happen...just that the risk is tolerable.


• And, speaking of Doc Ock, in his pre-villainous incarnation as Dr. Otto Octavius, I'm wondering why he was the only attendee at the big Sustainable Fusion Introduction Bash to get to wear eye protection? After all, the rest of the crowd was only a few feet behind him and they weren't offered the gee-whiz goggles.


• I thought it was pretty cool that Harry Osborn (aka, Green Goblin, Jr.) kept a big hunk of tritium in his unlocked wall safe in his den at home. There's only 25 pounds of it on the face of the planet, but most people probably wouldn't know how to use it to induce fusion so there's not a huge security risk to not spinning that safe dial a few times.


• Will B.J. Thomas' career get a huge boost now that "Raindrops" is prominently featured in one of the funnier scenes of the movie?


• The action scenes are predictably and uniformly terrific. In fact, I may be a little sore tomorrow due to the sympathetic straining, bouncing, flailing, whacking and flying I engaged in while trying to help the onscreen characters.


• Has Kirsten Dunst lost weight?


• And speaking of Anna Nicole Smith and losing weight...one of the pre-movie commercials featured Jiggly Anna and her diet plan. She may be a little lighter, but you can tell just by watching her that said diet plan was not loaded with, um, brain food. If you get my drift.

Well, I trust that you found those observations to be edifying. You've heard it many times already, but if you liked the first movie, you'll like this one even more.

Good Company

I was working yesterday to add the Permian Basin Area Foundation's Annual Report to its website. The PBAF is one of my pro bono clients and they're quite appreciative of the time I donate to keeping their site current. The Annual Report is one of the more complicated maintenance items I attend to, and I rarely have time to actually read it, as I'm more focused on the process of transferring it from print to web.

However, I suppose it's human nature to notice your own name when it appears in print, and my eye did catch my wife's and mine on the 2003 donor list. One of our friends lost his father last year and we had made a small donation to one of the funds administered by the Foundation in his memory, in accordance with the family's request. So, ours was among the couple hundred or so names appearing on the list.

Also catching my eye -- and this is the real point of this post -- was this entry on the donor list: President and Mrs. George W. Bush.

The Foundation administers scores of funds and I have no idea to which one(s) the First Family made a donation. But I thought it was great that they would provide financial support to something that benefits this area. As far as I know, this was not covered by the press or even disclosed to it, and the Foundation's Annual Report has no other reference to it other than a normal listing in the donor's section.

I know it sounds weird, but seeing the President's name listed along with many other "regular" citizens of Midland is a simple reminder of what a great country (and community) I'm privileged to live in.