Random Thursday

We prepared for the predicted cold snap (which arrived on schedule last night...temperatures are 30 degrees colder this morning than at this time yesterday, and snow is coming down in light flurries as I type this) by undertaking our annual ritual of installing flannel sheets on our bed. Flannel makes great sleeping in cold weather, although one must be careful not to overdo it. An ugly secret of the flannel bedding industry is that every year, scores of unwary people crawl between flannel sheets while wearing flannel pajamas, and aren't found again until the spring switch back to cotton sheets, when their stiff -- albeit cozy -- bodies are discovered fixed in place, unfortunate victims of Flannel-Velcro Syndrome.

• Bumper sticker sighting of the week: "Midwives help people out." Heh.


• Is there really a big market for midwife-related bumper stickery?


• And speaking of being with child, I'm getting tired of hearing how Keisha Castle-Hughes's out-of-wedlock pregnancy is an "intriguing parallel" to the story of the virgin Mary whom she portrays in the new movie about the birth of Jesus, The Nativity Story. I even heard one talking TV head observe that Castle-Hughes's boyfriend is a carpenter, same as Joseph, Mary's betrothed, as if that enhances the lovely mysticism around the whole situation. Maybe I'm overly sensitive, but attempting to equate this particular teen pregnancy with the miracle of the Virgin Birth is misguided at best, and insulting at worst.


• In fact, I can think of at least one religious group which has burned entire neighborhoods over less.


• Don't you just love the signs of the season: houses drapped with lights, Christmas tree lots going in on every vacant lot, lawsuits over nativity scenes? One of my favorite signs is when the email spammers switch over to their festive holiday themes. Within the past few hours I've received emails touting various prescription drugs, with the subject lines of "Seven swans a-swimming" (Zoloft), "Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer" (Avandia), "Jack Frost nipping on your nose" (Coral Calcium), "Hang a shining star upon the highest bough" (Diflucan), and "And then we got upsot" (Cozaar). If that doesn't get you in the Christmas mood, nothing will.


• I know that "upsot" thing is from a carol, but I'm having trouble remembering which one. Is it "Jingle Bells"? Can someone confirm that?

OK, that should just about do it. Be sure to stop by and leave appropriate congratulations for Patti who completed her entry in this year's National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). I'm thinking about entering, myself; there's still 15 hours left in November. That's less than 4,000 words per hour...

Ambi.Me

I went for a bike ride this morning -- an amazing thing in itself, considering it's the end of November and the temperature was in the upper 50s (our high tomorrow will be 20 degrees lower than that) -- and I got in the usual stream-of-consciousness zone that makes cycling the same route over and over again not only bearable but pleasurable.

One of the zoned-out thoughts that occurred to me is that the art of operating a 10-key "adding machine" by touch is probably a dying one. I can do it; I'll bet Gwynne can, as well. But I'm not sure that the presence of the numeric pad on most computer keyboards is sufficient to ensure that skill gets passed along to the next generation.

I then started considering how I used an adding machine; one thing led to another, and you're stuck with the following, which may be used by some to argue against Intelligent Design and by others as proof that God has a sense of humor:

• I tally the checkbook with the adding machine using my right hand...
• ...but I pencil the total into the check register using my left hand.



• I throw a baseball left-handed...
• ...but I bat right-handed.



• I hold and shoot a pistol with my left hand...
• ...but I sight through my right eye (another way of saying that that's my dominant eye).



• I use a mouse with my left hand (OK, I'm actually ambidextrous, mousily-speaking, but prefer the left side)...
• ...but I use the touchpad on my laptop with my right hand*.



• And for a seasonal flourish, when I wrap a gift, I use left-handed scissors......
• ...but I pull tape from the dispenser and apply it with my right hand.

I think this gets us back on track with our minimum daily requirement of Content Free® posts. I've also put this in the category of Memes, so feel free to regale us with your own limbic proclivities.

*My theory is that it has something to do with the electrical current generated by my body. The cursor skips crazily when I use my left hand, but it's much better behaved when controlled by the right. I've posted about this before. You do remember, don't you?

Remind me how this works again...

I just got a warning ticket from the Blogging Police...something about impersonating a blogger. So I guess I'd better get busy and post something, if for no other reason than Jimmy Patterson has a page to fill next Monday. (That's an inside joke -- such as it is -- for the locals.)

So, what's been going on lately? Oh, here's one I never saw coming: the pneumatic Pamela Anderson is splitsville with Kid Rock. If those two can't make it, I'm not sure there's hope for any of us.

On the other hand, there's Will Smith. Now, I've always been a fan of his acting (The Wild Wild West notwithstanding), and he strikes me as a pretty decent guy, to boot, but I'm ready to join a fan club after reading his interview in Reader's Digest (yeah...so what? Wanna make something of it?). Here's Will on marriage:

I guess I'll close with the obligatory Thanksgiving report, sort of. Here's a question: what do you get when you combine a digital camera with a motor drive, a tripod, a long lens, a 2gb SD card, and a bunch of handguns? Well, for one thing, this type of thing...

That last photo is MLB wreaking havoc with our new Springfield pistol. I love the way the photo includes the dirt kicking up behind the targets.

In closing, here's another obligatory photo, this one of turkeys:

These two gobblers were striding down the middle of Rio Street in Fort Stockton on Saturday morning, following Thanksgiving. We saw the whole flock (about 10 birds) during our morning run the day after Thanksgiving but didn't have a camera with us. Anyway, they were obviously breathing easy, having escaped the dining table for another year.

OK, does this get me back on track? Even if I had to resort to quoting Reader's Digest?

Condolences to a Friend

Please join me in extending sympathies to fellow Midland blogger Wallace Craig whose dad passed away earlier this afternoon. His death wasn't unexpected but that doesn't make it any easier.

Our prayers are with you, amigo.

Giving Thanks

Thank you, Lord, for many blessings, too many to count, but especially for this one.

Think I'll take the week off

Hope you have a safe, healthy and happy Thanksgiving holiday!

Movie Review: "Casino Royale"

[No spoilers]

We caught the first matinée of the "new" James Bond movie, Casino Royale. I can't remember the first movie with that title, which was released in 1967, but it's just as well since it wasn't really a part of the franchise that most of us are familiar with.

As you no doubt know by now, this incarnation supposedly takes us back to the beginning of Bond's career. He's just achieved "double-0" status (presumably he was a single digit intern of some sort up to now), which means he gets to kill with impunity, and in a way, he becomes the Dwight Schrute of Her Majesty's Secret Service, taking his new responsibilities quite seriously.

Actually, the movie starts off with a great chase scene with nary an Aston-Martin -- or any other sports car, for that matter -- in sight. It made me look forward to Spiderman 3, due for release next May, according to the trailer. But that's neither here nor there. Daniel Craig makes a passable Bond, but he's no Sean. His debonair needs serious evolving at this point, but I suppose he'll grow into the role.

It was odd, however, to watch what was supposed to be the beginning of his career being played out in the current time, along with all the current gadgets and technology (and related product placements, most Sony, Sony-Ericsson, Ford, Range Rover, and, of course, Aston-Martin). But this Bond doesn't rely on gadgetry to the same extent as we've seen in many of the other 007 films...and that's not really a bad thing. There is one rather shocking display of technology, but I promised no spoilers so I'll leave it at that.

I'm being awfully coy about this, aren't I? OK, I'll cut to the chase. This is an entertaining movie, generally predictable but with a few unexpected twists, and just enough humor to keep it from being ponderous. The new/old Bond is far from infallible, not exceptionally suave, and the action is often riveting and only occasionally dumb. The one exception is an interminable high stakes poker game, but we can't really dispense with it because the whole plot turns around it. I apologize to you poker fans, but I can't work myself into an edge-of-the-seat frenzy over a card game. Fortunately, they took enough breaks to keep things lively.

I did miss the traditional 007 opening credits (you know what I mean), and I'll save you the trouble of trying to deal with the inevitable effects of a large soft drink and a two hour movie by telling you that nothing happens during or after the closing credits.

If you're a fan of the series, or if you have a hankering for some movie popcorn, this is as good a way as any to spend a couple of hours. We liked it; I think you will, too.

Who's on First

From the Department of Confusing Nomenclature, News Release Division:

According to reliable sources, Ted Williams had no comment.

Random Thursday

I don't have time for this, you know. In fact, I actually turned down a project yesterday because I couldn't make the deadline requested by the client. If you could see my pathetic cash flow statement for the year, you'd understand the significance of that decision. But the blog must go on, so...

• I was looking up the definition of "hypocrisy" this morning and imagine my surprise to find a picture of Geraldo on Fox & Friends protesting the exploitative sleaziness embodied in O.J. Simpson's new book (which I won't dignify with either a link or a title).


• To his credit, however, Geraldo did take his employer to task for allowing the publishing company -- apparently a subsidiary -- to do the book deal in the first place.


• One can only assume that the apparently racially-motivated jury that acquitted Simpson in the criminal case is still proud of itself for sticking it to The Man, unless, of course, they now realize that Simpson has succeeded in placing them into the "The Man" category as well.


• Still, as we saw a week or so ago, "sending a message" is really more important than actually dealing with issues.


• Just for the record, there's absolutely no truth to the rumor that Nicole Simpson's family has hired Bobby Knight to pay OJ a visit. Wish it was true, but it's not.


• Sorry. I just realized my Rhetor-O-Meter was inadvertently pegged in the red. Let me dial it back here a tad.


• First hard freeze of the season for us here in lovely west Texas. I even pulled out the nerdy earmuffs for the morning walk. But Abbye loves it, now that her coat is back with a vengeance. She was willing to actually touch her rear end to the sidewalk during a "sit" while waiting to cross a street, instead of hovering inches above it as she did last February when she was sporting an unfashionably balding butt.


• Now that Emmitt Smith is the new champeen of Dancing With the Stars, look for an increased supply of professional athletes to join the cast of future editions. I can't wait until Yao Ming's schedule clears enough for him to participate.

Just for the record, I'm pretty sure that the preceding post can be chalked up to an administrative error.

Eating Crow

I admit it -- I was surprised that Emmitt Smith pulled off the upset and won Dancing With the Stars. I'm happy for him, because he didn't have the same raw talent as the other finalist, Mario Lopez, but I also feel a bit sorry for Mario because, frankly, he's a more accomplished dancer. Emmitt had the popular vote, though (those teenaged girls didn't come through for Lopez after all!).

He's a classy guy and still an able athlete, but his real edge was his partner, Cheryl Burke, who has now won the last two DWTS competitions. She was much more personable than Mario's professional partner, Karina Smirnoff. At some point, DWTS becomes a popularity contest, and personalities make a big difference.

So, hats off to Emmitt. I apologize for not being able to prognosticate any better than I can dance...but I can get better at the latter. I think I'll give up on the former.

Desert Island Movie Meme

I know, I know -- the "if you were stranded on a desert island, which movies/ books/ music/ beverages/ non-venomous reptiles/ television evangelist/ Hooter's girl/ Pro Bowling Tour player would you want to have with you" memes have been done to death, but here's a slightly different twist. It still deals with movies, but you get to pick one title for each of the following ten genres.

Here's my list (genres shown in bold) of the movies I'd choose for my desert island stranding:

• Western - Silverado


• Horror - Shaun of the Dead


• Sci-Fi - Serenity


• Musical - Fiddler on the Roof


• Comedy - The Princess Bride


• War - Saving Private Ryan


• Action - Pirates of the Caribbean


• Foreign - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon


• Classic (before 1960) - The Quiet Man


• Documentary - Mad Hot Ballroom


• Bonus Pick (any genre) - My Cousin Vinny

These are all pretty safe picks (choosing Shaun of the Dead in the horror category is probably cheating a bit, but I can't think of a "traditional" horror movie that I'd want to see more than once). Perhaps yours are a bit edgier...?

Simply Amusing

My Texas blogging friend Deborah (author of Glove Box Stories over at SanLeon.net, and a woman of infinite patience as seen in the way she tolerates my plot suggestions -- which generally arise when I feel that too much estrogen has been applied -- by refraining from calling me an idiot) emailed me a cartoon this morning that had the intended consequence of making me smile, and an unintended (I think) one of causing me to spend more time than I could spare browsing through additional work by the cartoonist.

The artist/cartoonist is Rob Esmay (not to be confused with, although possibly related to A-list blogger Dean Esmay), and even if you're not familiar with his name or his comic, A Case in Point, you'll recognize his style, which is one of simplicity and even nostalgia, combined with relevant subject matter presented with pleasing irony. A, um, case in point, from October 16, 2006:

So, tonight, while you're waiting for the results from the big Dancing With the Stars finale (where, sadly, Emmitt Smith's smooth moves will be trounced by the massive fan base of Mario Lopez, said base consisting of a gazillion young women who were born to text -- and if you don't know what that means, you're part of Emmitt's problem), I suggest you amble through Rob's portfolio for a refreshing alternative to For Better or Worse.

Technorati tag: Rob Esmay

Stream of Unconsciousness: Paying the Bills

Today is Bill Paying Day, the time when I send checks, EFTs, or record automatic payments in return for essential services such as heating, lighting, water, and bad original programming via the Sci-Fi Channel.

I derive a certain amount of satisfaction out of the simple blessing of being able to pay our bills in full and on time, recognizing that this is not something everyone can do all the time. In fact, I will confess that I sometimes feel a bit like Job in his pre-it-all-hit-the-fan-at-once days, and I can't help wondering when the other shoe will drop. OTOH, I've been wondering that for a couple of decades, so perhaps I'm just paranoid. But you know what they say about being paranoid. And we know you know.

There are two accountants living in our household, and this makes for (1) really boring dinner conversation ("Did you read that article in the Journal today about SOX?" "Yeah, that was something, wasn't it?" "Pass the pepper, please.") and (2) a fiscally-responsible division of labor when it comes to family finances. Our checks-and-balances system is exactly that: I write most of the checks and MLB balances the checkbook. This serves to keep me terrified and humble.

The other thing my accounting-derived OCD drives me to do is keep exquisitely detailed records of our monthly transactions. OK, not all that detailed, but I can tell you the average cost per KWH of our electricity last month, compared to three years ago. Anyway, one of the potentially interesting phenomena I've noticed over the years is that the good folks to whom we send monthly payments are rarely content with their own names. Or, they've just up and left. To wit:

• CellularOne ==> Alltel

Cox Communication ==> Suddenlink
Energas ==> Atmos
Southwestern Bell ==> AT&T
TU Electric ==> TXU

Actually, some of those companies changed names more than once over the years.

I forget where I was going with this. Apparently, my blogging instinct keeps writing checks that my brain can't cash.

Photo Caption Contest

Most people would look at this photo and think, "my, what a cute ring-tailed lemur, the most terrestrial of the lemurs and, outside of zoos, found only on the island of Madagascar."

Others, though -- most Gazette readers, included -- will readily anthropomorphize this character and record their witty remarks in the comment section.

Winners will be obvious.

Embedded Media HTML Generator

Here's a nifty little tool for generating the coding required to embed Flash, QuickTime, Real Media and Windows Media movie files in your website.

Embedding is the same technique used for integrating all of those YouTube videos you're now seeing on blogs at every turn nowadays. It's not rocket science, but it does require some non-intuitive code strings that you can never locate if you don't do this sort of thing very often.

One caveat is that the coding it generates is wrapped in a table code container. OTOH, the guts of the embed coding is easily pulled if you want to fit it within your own div wrapper.

I just tried it with a QuickTime movie and it's simple and fast. And did I mention that it's free?

The Gazette Gets Plugged

I debated whether to post about this or not and decided to do so as an encouragement to the rest of the local blogging community...and to local MSM outlets, as well.

If you happened to catch the beginning of last night's 10:00 news broadcast on KMID-TV, you saw the feature on Jennifer Taylor and her new bereavement photography ministry, I Say My Prayers. I thought it was very well done, and will be an important step in getting out the word to those who might benefit from this service.

You may or may not have noticed what came at the end of that feature -- a plug for the Gazette as the source for the story. In case you missed it...well, it seemed like a great excuse to join YouTube and see what the cool kids are doing:

While it doesn't necessarily compare with the mention that Jessica's Well got on Fox News a couple of years back, it's still an example of how the joint efforts of traditional media and bloggers can work for the benefit of the public at large. This is old hat to Jimmy Patterson at the Midland Reporter-Telegram, and Jeff McDonald has incorporated blogged material in KWES-TV's (NBC) website, but I haven't seen much on-air acknowledgment by any of the local TV stations*. KMID's news director, Mel Hudman, gets the credit for taking this step. It's not a huge thing, but I think it helps the credibility of the Permian Basin blogging community as a whole.

*If this is happening and I'm just missing it, feel free to correct my perception in the comments. That's why they're there. Well, and for you to tell me what an awesome job I'm doing.

Note: We'll have the whole news feature up on isaymyprayers.com a little later, if you missed it. And here it is (beware; it's a 6 meg QuickTime download).

Renewing Old Rivalries

The Midland Reporter-Telegram puts a most puzzling spin on the newly released City Crime Report, choosing to present it within the context of a "Midland-vs-Odessa" rivalry. Even the headline of the story is provocative: Report: Odessa safer than Midland

The article provides a number of quotes that serve to reinforce the idea that (1) Midland and Odessa are somehow engaged in a zero-sum game of crime statistics, and (2) Odessa is somehow fudging its numbers.

Then there's this amazing quote by a Midland county deputy sheriff: "We usually have a lower crime rate than Odessa does," he said. "I'd say 50-60 percent of crime in Midland was committed by people from Odessa."

[Now, I will concede that the sheriff's department should have a handle on the cities of residence of offenders, and there could well be a statistical basis for the sheriff's statement. I'd like to see those statistics...along with the same stats from Odessa. Could it be that we're simply trading offenders?]

The same guy later was quoted as saying ""You can make numbers look the way you want them to, so I'm not convinced", which might cause one to question how Midland's statistics managed to look relatively better through the years.

Thankfully, Midland County Attorney Al Schorre put things back in the proper perspective:

I'll confess that I once subscribed to the "myth" Mr. Schorre describes, but came to my senses, ironically, once I moved to Midland almost 25 years ago. It's past time that this myth was laid to rest.

In any event, there's no good purpose served by casting reports like this in an "us-vs-them" light, especially considering how much "we" have to gain (or lose) depending on how well we work together.

Election Thoughts

It occurred to me last night that the faithful reader of the Gazette is probably itching to get my take on last Tuesday's national elections, and so I spent a good twenty minutes or so (during commercial breaks in ER, which I find myself inexplicably drawn back into after a few years of apathy) to draft a pithy post of political punditry in which the implications of said elections were dissected and splayed open for all to see and marvel upon.

After re-reading the post, I admitted to myself that my only purpose was to create a semi-plausible context for using the phrase "not ignoring the elephant that's not in the room," and that hardly seemed sufficient justification, so I deleted it.

However, lest some people read into my relative silence on the issues more than is appropriate, I'll throw out my $0.02 in the matter, and then return to the more pressing matters of tracking the squirrel-related issues in my backyard.

I congratulate the Democrats for an impressive overall victory, and suggest that they use this granting of temporary majority status by the American electorate to learn the distinction between statesmanship and political hackitry. Their Republican predecessors couldn't figure it out, and while they were busy designing a monument to their decades-to-come dynasty, the electorate took things into their own hands.

Which, of course, they'll do again. Neither party appears to be able to absorb the truth that the majority of Americans desire a centrist type of leadership in their government. Deviation too far to either end of the spectrum will eventually be punished at the polls. Tuesday's results appear to offer a fresh opportunity to learn this lesson. I, for one, will do my best to curb my cynicism while waiting to see if it happens.

In conclusion, my favorite summation of the elections comes from my fellow Midland blogger over at Sleepless in Midland when he characterizes the election outcome by quoting Jane's Law: The devotees of the party in power are smug and arrogant. The devotees of the party out of power are insane.

I, myself, intend to remain smugly insane. I draw the line, however, at arrogance, and I heartily recommend to you that same philosophy.

"I Say My Prayers" Bereavement Photography: Upcoming News Story

Mel Hudman, the news director of the local ABC affiliate (KMID-TV), just emailed to give me a heads-up about the story they're planning to run tomorrow about Jennifer Taylor's bereavement photography ministry. For those of you in the local viewing area, there will be a preview during the 6:00 p.m. news broadcast, with the full story to run during the 10:00 p.m. show.

I haven't seen the segment, but if it captures only a fraction of Jennifer's caring spirit, it will be worth watching.

Kudos to Mel for picking up on this story via the pages of the Gazette and recognizing that it deserves a wider audience.

Movie Mini-Review: "Meet Joe Black"

I had never seen Meet Joe Black, the 1998 movie starring Brad Pitt as Death and Anthony Hopkins as the corporate giant he's come to take away. And since AMC was one of the few channels that wasn't constantly interrupting programming for election reports, I watched the last eight hours of the movie tonight and all I can say is, wow!...what an incredibly, unspeakably annoying soundtrack. If you look up "subtlety" in the thesaurus, you'll find the first antonym listed is "the soundtrack from Meet Joe Black."

I did like the line near the end of the movie (I think it came around hour twelve) about death and taxes.

OK, I think that about covers it.

The Impending Apocalypse: Sign #937

Texas A&M is ranked #13 in the AP preseason college basketball poll, ahead of every other team in the Big 12 South*, and one place behind perennial powerhouse Duke.

At least the writer of the linked story also recognizes the implausibility of the situation, reminding us that this is the first time A&M has been ranked since 1980.

*Thanks to Gunner at Target Centermass for pointing out the error in my original post, which overlooked the overall third place spot held by Kansas, which, the last time I checked, was still in the Big 12. (Actually, I have a second-cousin who plays football for Kansas.)

Gift Music

After reading a gushing review of Marcia Ball's music over at Gwynne's joint, I decided to take a look at the iTunes Store and see what it had to offer. I discovered two things. First, I was familiar with Ms. Ball's music, even though I didn't know it. I immediately recognized her distinctive voice, and so I thumbed through my iPod and sure enough, her rendition of Eugene is in a blues/zydeco compilation entitled Out of the Blue. I'm not crazy about that particular song, but listening to the samples from Ball's Live! Down The Road album highlighted some tracks I'd like to add to my library.

That segues into the second thing I learned, which is that the iTunes Store now has an option to send a song, an album, or a playlist as a gift to someone else. Perhaps this option has been around for a long time, but I just noticed it, and aside from the really annoying way that Apple displays the option ("Gift This Music") I think this is an excellent idea. The only problem is that not everyone has access to the iTunes Store. Wouldn't it be nice to know in advance if this kind of gift was possible?

I've come up with one possible solution, at least as far as bloggers are concerned. Please meet the newest member of the button family, "iTake iTunes." By displaying this chiclet on your blog or personal website, you tell the world that you're not only cool enough to have access to the iTunes Store, but also greedy needy willing to accept the gift of music from anyone so inclined to buy it for you.

If you think this is a good idea -- and, really, who wouldn't? I mean, it could lead to free music, and if the downside is that it might be by Brad Paisley, well, life's a risk, isn't it? -- feel free to download the little image and post it on your site, and sit back and wait for the tunes to roll in.

[By the way, the concept of creating a custom playlist and giving it to someone else raises a lot of interesting scenarios...like, what songs would you include on a playlist for your ex-whatever? Or for your least favorite boss? Or for Howard Dean? Or for that North Korean lunatic-for-life?]

City of Midland Polling Places

The Gazette is getting a number of hits via people who are googling terms like "Midland Texas polling places." I don't have that information here, but you can download a list of the polling places by precinct number in PDF format via Midland County's website.

Update: Oh, what the heck. No sense burning up the county's bandwidth. Here's the list of polling places by precinct.

This has been a public service announcement; we return you to your regularly scheduled Content Free® programming, in progress.

Oh look...a baby squirrel!

Grace in Action

Wikipedia's entry on grace includes the following definition: "Divine grace is a Christian term for gifts granted to humanity by God, that God is under no need or obligation to grant."

A practical example of grace that falls within this definition is opening your garage door at 7:30 a.m. to find that the $3,000 bicycle you inadvertently left parked in the driveway fourteen hours earlier is still there.

Springfield XD Sub-Compact: Initial Impressions

MLB had the day off and so we headed for the shooting range this afternoon to break in the new pistol.

The range was quite busy, and someone pulled into our customary spot at the benchrest bay, so we headed the other direction, to one of the open pistol ranges. We figured that was probably a better choice anyway, since it gave us more options for target distance and shooting positions.

I stapled a couple of targets onto the backing boards and walked through the pistol's operation and safety features again, as much for my benefit as for my wife's. Keep in mind that neither of us had ever been on our own with a semi-automatic pistol, and we wanted to err on the side of conservatism (which, to be honest, is the way we approach all of our dealings with guns anyway).

I went first, so she could see the recoil and hear the noise. That short-barreled .40 caliber pistol has plenty of both, compared to the Colt Python we normally shoot (well, unless we're firing .357 ammo). My first shots were pretty dismal, as I was unaccustomed to the trigger pull, the grip safety mechanism, and basically everything else about the gun. However, the few times that I managed to squeeze the trigger when the target came in proximity to the sights made it obvious that this is a gun that will shoot where you aim it.

My wife was up next and I have to tell you that should you ever decide to become a threat around her while she's holding that little Springfield, you should make sure your next of kin knows where the safety deposit key is stored. OK, that's a little gruesome, but the point is that she out-shot me from the first magazine, and was quite comfortable with the gun from the outset. Maybe I need to invest in LASIK surgery to compete with her. (Note: I took that terrible photo with my phone, and I'm fortunate I even got her in the frame. The sun was so bright that I couldn't see anything on the screen; I just pushed the button and hoped for the best.)

I showed her how to work the ammo-loading tool and she was quite adept at that, too. She loaded and used the 9-shot magazine, and I used the 11-shot case. It's amazing how easy some tasks become when you use the tool designed to do the job. ;-)

By the time we'd gone through a couple of boxes of ammo, we were both feeling much more comfortable with the gun, and our accuracy had improved considerably (especially mine, although I had more room for improvement). MLB is going to have to continue experimenting with the right position for her non-firing hand, as it kept getting clipped by the recoiling slide. And I still need to get used to gripping the gun so that the integrated safety is disengaged. Overall, though, we enjoyed the target practice, and it was with a sense of accomplishment that we adjourned from the range and rewarded ourselves with a visit to Starbucks for coffee (gingerbread latte for her) and a shortbread cookie. Who says the West is still completely Wild?

Local Station "Bugging" Me

I'm getting increasingly annoyed by our local NBC-TV affiliate (sorry, Jeff), which for some reason has decided that viewers of shows like The Office also want to know what breaking news will be coming up on the 10 p.m. broadcast. The random headlines at the bottom of the screen are distracting and, for me, useless. The only influence they'll have over my decision to watch the late news is probably not the one they hoped for.

It's taken a few years to get accustomed to the semi-opaque "bugs" (or DOGs -- digital on-screen graphics) that keep the networks' logos permanently in front of us, and some of the cable channels have started periodically running animated mini-trailers for their hit shows in one or both corners of the screen.

For some reason, relevance seems to matter. Running a sitcom teaser on top of another sitcom is OK (relatively speaking), but running a news teaser on top of the sitcom is just distracting, especially when the story being touted is hardly "stop the presses" material.

Ninety-nine cent downloads from the iTunes Store are looking better all the time.

The Gun I've Never Owned (Until Now)

I had despaired of ever finding my preferred firearm locally, until Tuesday afternoon when I received a phone call.

"Hey, did you ever find one of those Springfield's you were looking for?"

"Nope. Nobody in town has one, and no one can tell me where to find one."

"Well, I'm at Between the Walls, and they've got a new one and a used one!"

To make a long story shorter, say hello to...well, you know:

It's a Springfield XD Sub-Compact, 3" barrel, .40 cal S&W. It's shown here with the 9 round magazine; it also has an 11 round magazine that extends the grip about an inch, making it fit larger hands more comfortably.

This is the first semi-auto I've ever owned; my handgun background is strictly revolvers. It took me a while to get comfortable with the cocking, slide locking, and disassembly processes, and to fully understand the safety features and safe handling requirements. I have yet to actually chamber a round, but I hope MLB and I can get to the range this weekend and shoot a couple of boxes of practice ammo.

That is, if I don't cripple myself first. Since I have very little experience loading ammo magazines, I started shoving rounds into the holders and quickly determined that I apparently wasn't man enough to completely fill them. I just about gave myself a hernia and still could get only 10 rounds into one magazine and 8 into the other. "What a weenie," I thought.

Later, as I was going over the items in the case the gun was packaged in, I noticed an oddly-shaped piece of plastic inset in the cushioning foam. I pulled it free and turned it over in my hands, trying to discern its function. You're ahead of me, aren't you? Sure enough, it turned out to be -- drumroll -- a magazine loader, designed specifically to allow one to top off the ammo holders without a self-inflicted stroke. And, frankly, even with the loader, getting that last round into each magazine was a chore, and I had to pat myself on the back, very gingerly of course, for getting as far as I did without mechanical assistance.

I'm looking forward to shooting the gun; I've heard a lot of good things about Springfields. I'll let you know if I'll be adding my voice to the choir.

The post title is a movie reference. You did catch it, didn't you? I thought so.

Kerry Response

A friend just emailed this to me; the original source is unknown to me.

If some of our politicians had only a fraction of the class of those serving our country in harm's way, we'd all be better off.

Amazing Squirrels

One day last week, while MLB was home during the day, we decided to practice some of our dance steps in anticipation of last Saturday's President's Ball. We usually practice in our game room, which is the only area of the house with enough open space. During the day, we leave our door open so that we can have a view of the backyard through the glass storm door.

So, we were gliding (a euphemism for "stumbling") about, practicing some swing steps (which we are really not very good with), when we happened to glance out the back door, whereupon we both immediately burst into laughter at what we saw:

This squirrel was standing a couple of feet from the door, peering through the glass at us. He had apparently been walking by when he happened to look in and -- well, obviously, he couldn't believe what he was seeing. In fact, he stood like that for more than a minute (long enough for me to grab my camera and snap a couple of shots), trying to comprehend the sight. I have no idea what was going through his tiny little brain, but his body language speaks volumes.

It's humbling to know that our dancing is a source of amusement to varmints.

By the way, do you remember my mention of a photo processing program called Photomatix Pro? You can refresh your memory here, as desired. This program is used to combine photos taken with different exposures, yielding a High Dynamic Range (HDR) image that can be quite spectacular. But I've found another use for the program and that is to rescue a poor shot. In this case, as you can tell, the squirrel was standing in the shade, but right in front of a brightly sunlit section of the patio. Because there was a glass door between us, I couldn't use a fill flash, nor did I have time to set up a tripod for a shutter speed slow enough to brighten the squirrel. The image I did capture is shown at right.

I could have done some tedious processing in Photoshop to lighten the squirrel without blowing out the background, but instead I used the Levels command in Photoshop to create a new image with a lightened squirrel AND a totally blown-out background. I then used Photomatix to combine the original photo and the new one, with the result being the one you see at the top of the page.

You may not run into a lot of situations where you need something like this, but it really came in handy this time.