
Recently in Texas Category

Seriously. The white Lexus SUV that was ahead of me looked pristine, and every other car in sight had no visible signs of dirt and grime. It made me wonder how many of the owners had their cars washed as a matter of habit. "Oh, it's Saturday morning; time to get the car washed." Frankly, this kind of mindset has no place in a region that's received less than 4" of rain during the past year, and the lakes supplying most of the drinking water are drying up.- White vehicles cannot be washed. Don't whine. You know good and well you picked out that boring white car for the sole reason that it doesn't show dirt and dust like darker colors. So, own it, and live with it.
- Black vehicles cannot be washed. You knew what you were getting into when you picked out that bad boy. Own it, and live with it.
- Clean vehicles cannot be washed. And by clean, I mean if you can tell the true color of the vehicle by looking at it, it's not dirty enough to require washing.
The politics and legal issues of the situation are possibly
insurmountable, but the cost of building infrastructure that could transport
enough water to make a difference is just mind-boggling.
I've not seen a cost estimate for a massive water transport project, but with a little back-of-the-envelope calculating, it's possible to create an order-of-magnitude guess by using another massive and well-known project as a comparison: The Trans-Alaska Pipeline (TAPS), completed in 1977 to move crude oil from the North Slope of Alaska to Port Valdez in south Alaska.
TAPS consists of a 48" pipeline stretching for 800 miles. It cost about $8 billion in 1977 dollars, and has a capacity of around 2, 000,000 barrels per day (equivalent to 84 million gallons per day). The crude oil that the pipeline transports weighs about 7.4 pounds per gallon.
Using these facts and some additional assumptions, we can paint a very primitive picture of what it would entail to build a similar pipeline to transport water. Let's assume that we want to grab water from the mighty Mississippi River and move it to Lake O.H. Ivie in west central Texas, a major source of water for Midland. We'll use Vicksburg, Mississippi as the assumed origin of the pipeline, since it's roughly at the same latitude as the end point.
It's about 600 miles from Vicksburg to the lake. All things being equal, the cost of the pipeline would be $22.5 billion, based on the inflation-adjusted cost of TAPS ($30 billion for 800 miles). You could rightly argue that the rough Alaskan terrain inflated the TAPS cost considerably; drastic elevation changes required expensive pump stations, and other factors such as weather, water crossings, environmental safeguards, etc. drove up the cost.
However, the TAPS project had one huge advantage that our MS-to-TX project wouldn't have: less than 10% of the land crossed by the pipeline was privately owned; the rest is state- or federal-government owned. While I have no doubt some rather intense negotiations went on to get easements across those lands, it must have been a cakewalk compared to getting easements from potentially hundreds or thousands of landowners between Texas and Mississippi.
There are a couple of additional considerations to complicate things. Water is heavier than crude oil (at least the crude produced from the North Slope of Alaska). Pumps have to be bigger to move the increased weight. (Also, scientists created a substance that was mixed in with the oil to make it slide more easily through the pipeline - known in the trade as "slickum" - that reduced the required pumping capacity, but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want it mixed in with your drinking water.)
While 84 million gallons per day sounds like a lot of water, it's still only enough to meet the daily demands of four cities the size of Midland (based on our current 22 million gallons per day usage). And we haven't even considered the cost to operate and maintain the pipeline.
So, if a pipeline doesn't provide the necessary capacity, what about digging a big ditch? Canal systems have been used for centuries to distribute water. I have no idea what it might cost to dig a canal from Mississippi to Texas, but the logistical issues are probably many times more complicated (it's comparatively easy to run a pipeline under an interstate, for example). Then there's the issue of elevation change. Vicksburg is essentially at sea level; O.H. Ivie is about 1,500' higher. With few exceptions, water runs downhill, and you have to convince it to do otherwise. I'm sure there are some engineers in the audience who can compute the horsepower needed for pumps that will move a few hundred million gallons of water per day uphill. I can't, but I'm guessing it's a bunch (sorry to have to use such technical terminology).
Having said all of this, I suspect that if we were starting with a blank slate today, we'd conclude that our current interstate highway system could not be built, due to imposing economic and political roadblocks (pun intended). A national water distribution system is achievable, but I doubt we have the national resolve to make it happen.





Here are the details behind the map:
| County | # of People Into Midland | Avg Income Per Capita - In | # of People From Midland | Avg Income Per Capita - Out | Net Change in Population | Net Income |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Kern Co, CA | 30 | 24,200 | 0 | - | 30 | 726,000 |
| Los Angeles, CA | 51 | 18,200 | 18 | 38,800 | 33 | 229,800 |
| Orange, CA | 23 | 23,200 | 0 | - | 23 | 533,600 |
| San Diego, CA | 50 | 18,800 | 23 | 13,000 | 27 | 641,000 |
| Riverside, CA | 24 | 30,100 | 0 | - | 24 | 722,400 |
| San Bernadino, CA | 38 | 17,200 | 0 | - | 38 | 653,600 |
| Clark, NV | 45 | 11,700 | 0 | - | 45 | 526,500 |
| Maricopa, AZ | 77 | 13,500 | 32 | 39,400 | 45 | (221,300) |
| Denver, CO | 21 | 18,600 | 0 | - | 21 | 390,600 |
| San Juan, NM | 24 | 53,700 | 0 | - | 24 | 1,288,800 |
| Bernalillo, NM | 21 | 35,600 | 26 | 21,100 | (5) | 199,000 |
| Dona Ana, NM | 34 | 18,300 | 18 | 14,200 | 16 | 366,600 |
| Chaves, NM | 24 | 20,100 | 20 | 13,600 | 4 | 210,400 |
| Roosevelt, NM | 24 | 9,200 | 0 | - | 24 | 220,800 |
| Eddy, NM | 42 | 20,400 | 27 | 18,900 | 15 | 346,500 |
| Lea, NM | 136 | 36,000 | 71 | 18,700 | 65 | 3,568,300 |
| Tulsa, OK | 26 | 36,900 | 31 | 83,100 | (5) | (1,616,700) |
| Oklahoma, OK | 42 | 25,400 | 49 | 33,500 | (7) | (574,700) |
| Cleveland, OK | 24 | 24,800 | 0 | - | 24 | 595,200 |
| Potter, TX | 41 | 26,800 | 28 | 25,400 | 13 | 387,600 |
| Randall, TX | 65 | 46,300 | 56 | 22,300 | 9 | 1,760,700 |
| Hale, TX | 26 | 13,900 | 0 | - | 26 | 361,400 |
| Lubbock, TX | 327 | 22,400 | 310 | 21,000 | 17 | 814,800 |
| Hockley, TX | 33 | 20,700 | 0 | - | 33 | 683,100 |
| Yoakum, TX | 57 | 21,100 | 0 | - | 57 | 1,202,700 |
| Gaines, TX | 41 | 27,400 | 30 | 47,500 | 11 | (301,600) |
| Dawson, TX | 84 | 13,000 | 67 | 12,700 | 17 | 241,100 |
| Scurry, TX | 46 | 29,600 | 36 | 21,900 | 10 | 573,200 |
| Andrews, TX | 86 | 19,300 | 76 | 17,700 | 10 | 314,600 |
| Martin, TX | 121 | 18,200 | 109 | 18,300 | 12 | 207,500 |
| Howard, TX | 157 | 18,800 | 155 | 19,800 | 2 | (117,400) |
| Mitchell, TX | 0 | - | 23 | 28,000 | (23) | (644,000) |
| Nolan, TX | 12 | 30,200 | 0 | - | 12 | 362,400 |
| Winkler, TX | 34 | 33,700 | 30 | 17,200 | 4 | 629,800 |
| Ector, TX | 1042 | 25,400 | 902 | 21,000 | 140 | 7,524,800 |
| Taylor, TX | 107 | 30,300 | 75 | 19,800 | 32 | 1,757,100 |
| Reeves, TX | 65 | 18,400 | 41 | 19,700 | 24 | 388,300 |
| Ward, TX | 63 | 26,400 | 61 | 18,300 | 2 | 546,900 |
| Crane, TX | 38 | 29,700 | 38 | 52,300 | - | (858,800) |
| Upton, TX | 41 | 44,900 | 27 | 16,600 | 14 | 1,392,700 |
| Reagan, TX | 24 | 21,000 | 0 | - | 24 | 504,000 |
| Tom Green, TX | 201 | 18,400 | 117 | 21,900 | 84 | 1,136,100 |
| Pecos, TX | 64 | 36,600 | 54 | 16,700 | 10 | 1,440,600 |
| Presidio, TX | 77 | 9,200 | 45 | 9,200 | 32 | 294,400 |
| Brewster, TX | 102 | 13,700 | 37 | 11,200 | 65 | 983,000 |
| Brown, TX | 25 | 22,100 | 20 | 31,200 | 5 | (71,500) |
| Webb, TX | 34 | 8,400 | 0 | - | 34 | 285,600 |
| Wichita, TX | 42 | 18,200 | 0 | - | 42 | 764,400 |
| Denton, TX | 62 | 24,200 | 91 | 30,100 | (29) | (1,238,700) |
| Collin, TX | 61 | 26,300 | 98 | 45,200 | (37) | (2,825,300) |
| Parker, TX | 20 | 22,400 | 37 | 34,800 | (17) | (839,600) |
| Tarrant, TX | 173 | 26,100 | 280 | 26,100 | (107) | (2,792,700) |
| Dallas, TX | 163 | 32,300 | 156 | 34,400 | 7 | (101,500) |
| Hood, TX | 27 | 26,300 | 58 | 75,700 | (31) | (3,680,500) |
| Johnson, TX | 0 | - | 36 | 31,700 | (36) | (1,141,200) |
| Ellis, TX | 0 | - | 22 | 21,300 | (22) | (468,600) |
| Smith, TX | 33 | 27,200 | 28 | 29,800 | 5 | 63,200 |
| Gregg, TX | 0 | - | 18 | 64,200 | (18) | (1,155,600) |
| McClennan, TX | 20 | 29,800 | 24 | 14,600 | (4) | 245,600 |
| Bell, TX | 56 | 18,200 | 49 | 18,300 | 7 | 122,500 |
| Williamson, TX | 52 | 28,500 | 78 | 28,100 | (26) | (709,800) |
| Travis, TX | 89 | 21,400 | 107 | 33,200 | (18) | (1,647,800) |
| Hays, TX | 34 | 17,800 | 17 | 32,400 | 17 | 54,400 |
| Comal, TX | 22 | 30,800 | 27 | 52,100 | (5) | (729,100) |
| Bexar, TX | 106 | 21,000 | 159 | 23,300 | (53) | (1,478,700) |
| Brazos, TX | 22 | 23,500 | 22 | 30,400 | - | (151,800) |
| Montgomery, TX | 52 | 43,600 | 62 | 48,600 | (10) | (746,000) |
| Harris, TX | 265 | 38,800 | 202 | 46,000 | 63 | 990,000 |
| Fort Bend, TX | 66 | 39,900 | 46 | 39,800 | 20 | 802,600 |
| Brazoria, TX | 26 | 45,300 | 14 | 77,100 | 12 | 98,400 |
| Jefferson, TX | 25 | 24,400 | 0 | - | 25 | 610,000 |
| Nueces, TX | 48 | 23,700 | 18 | 19,400 | 30 | 788,400 |
| Totals | 5,233 | 4,301 | 932 | 15,438,100 |
It's difficult to draw any conclusions from this data without making some shaky assumptions. There's no explanation regarding methodology or clarification regarding the source of the data. There is a footnote that explains that the IRS doesn't report inter-county moves for fewer than ten people, which does explain why it appears that no one moved in or out of Midland County from or to any states other than California, Arizona, New Mexico, Colorado, and Oklahoma.
Sullivan was a boxer before turning to music, perhaps to avoid the burden of expectation that would accompany such a prestigious pugilistic appellation.
This flyer appears to be a promo for a tire company in Lubbock (the floating tire is obviously superimposed on a photo of the musicians; one can only guess at their relationship to the company). According to the bio, they worked radio stations in Fort Worth and Lubbock, so it's safe to assume that they were well known in Lubbock at the time this flyer was produced.

The duo formed in 1939, which seems to correspond with the general vintage of the collection of the miscellany I've been scanning and posting on this site. In 1941, they recorded "When My Blue Moon Turns to Gold," which Elvis Presley turned to money when he recorded a pop version in 1956. Here's a recording of the original version, courtesy of YouTube.
The scan appears to be a promotional flyer, on heavy card stock, and it highlights the group's appearances on the era's Big Dogs of Texas radio: WBAP (Fort Worth), KPRC (Houston), and WOAI (San Antonio).
The "Bewley" in the name refers to Bewley Mills, a flour company. What was it about flour companies that made them sponsors of musical groups on the radio?
According to the group's website, at one time the Chuck Wagon Gang was Columbia Record's second highest selling artist, behind only Xavier Cugat and just ahead of some upstart hillbilly named Johnny Cash.
An interesting tidbit is that even back then, musicians assumed different names for their public personae. In the case of the CWG, Dad was Dave Carter, and he was the father of Anna (real name Effie), Rose (Lola), and Jim (Ernest). I have no idea who Cy is...perhaps the announcer?

I suspect that most people in Texas have at least heard of the LCDs, which, according to Wikipedia (the font of all human knowledge, or at least semi-informed opinion and/or conjecture) bills itself as "the longest-running country band in the world." The group was created in 1931 to promote the products of Burrus Mill and Elevator Company of Fort Worth, Texas, back when radio advertising was in its infancy. That company's president, Pappy O'Daniel, was parodied in the movie, O Brother, Where Art Thou? The LCDs had a very popular live radio show that ran more than twenty years. For a comprehensive history of the group, check out a book entitled The Light Crust Doughboys are on the air: celebrating seventy years of Texas music.
Near as I can tell, Parker Willson fronted the band as emcee during the period around 1939-41. The photos below are scans of the flyer, and the reference to Vocalion Records on the reverse side seems to indicate that this was a promotional piece put out by that studio. The Vocalion label was discontinued in 1940 (again, according to Wikipedia), which further narrows down the age of the flyer.
Click on each thumbnail to see a larger version of the image.
This is a vastly different kind of "stick" compared to the one I photographed last year. This one is Mike Tyson, while that one is Michael Cera.

In case you haven't heard, Debra Medina's interview on Glenn Beck's radio program yesterday turned out to be an absolute train wreck, both for her and for Beck (although she had a lot more to lose than him, given that he specializes in causing train wrecks). If you missed it, you might want to take a moment to read the transcript posted on Beck's website. I'll wait here.
*whistling* *thumb-twiddling* *heel-rocking*
Pretty cringe-inducing, huh? Now, take a look at what Medina meant to say.
This stands out pretty clearly:
Medina's appeal to me all along has been twofold: her passion for state's rights and strict adherence to the US Constitution, and the fact that she's not a career politician. Unfortunately, the latter factor proved to be detrimental yesterday as she gave an unpolished and, frankly, a bumbling answer to a question that someone more experienced would have quickly dismissed. She compounded the problem by going on a tangent about screening her staff that served only to make her sound evasive and unsure. Having heard her speak in person, I know that neither of those descriptions are accurate, but given the absence of nuance in reportage, they're damaging beyond estimation.
The Texas blogosphere is hotly divided today between those who are defending Medina as being honest almost to a fault, and the victim of a nasty, carefully planned setup by Beck, and those who feel that we're at last now seeing the true candidate, an unskilled person in over her head and aligned with fringe political elements.
To me, this was a gigantic misstep for Medina, one that will hurt her already slim chances of getting elected. I was disappointed at her response (while at the same time being outraged at Beck's behavior; but then, he's not a journalist, he's an "entertainer," although his idea of entertainment and mine aren't even in the same universe), and I'm not sure there's enough time before the election for damage control.
Even worse, it's a distraction from the really important issues that should be driving this election: ensuring that Texas continues to be a leader in preserving and honoring the constitutional rights of states, and ensuring that private property owners in Texas are not overly burdened by governmental interference. To the extent that the Beck interview damages Medina's chances to make that happen, we'll all be losers.
If you've ever been curious about what goes on during a professional recording session, this is your chance to find out. They're streaming a session this morning beginning at 10:00 a.m. I assume that they'll provide a link somewhere on the above-referenced sites to allow you to tune in. (Unfortunately, I have a client meeting at the same time so I won't be able to watch.)
Update: I just realized that "Wednesday, January 19th" is an impossibility for 2010. Kyle, you need to check your calendar, bud.
Statewide, media have provided coverage of the anniversary. Perhaps the most widely seen coverage will be the story in the current edition of Texas Monthly Magazine. I haven't read the article, but by all accounts it's an accurate and even moving description of the disaster, as well as an unexpectedly sensitive treatment of the tradition and meaning for A&M students. (I say "unexpected" because Texas Monthly has a reputation for being biased toward A&M's arch-rival, the University of Texas.) The website also has an interesting video about the creation of the photo on the cover of the magazine, which features a computer-generated version of the bonfire. (Perceptive viewers will notice that a Mac was used for the 3D modeling.)
Locally, Jimmy Patterson has written an article for the Midland Reporter Telegram about the anniversary of the bonfire collapse. He's done his typically excellent job in reporting, and the only quibble I have with the article is one that probably isn't his fault anyway: if you're going to refer to the aforementioned University of Texas using the Aggie acronym, it's "tu" (lower case). I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and chalk that up to an editor's eye.
I worked on one bonfire during my five-year stint at A&M. As a freshman in the Corps of Cadets in 1970, about the only thing I remember is how long the four-hour work sessions were, and how short the four-hour rests seemed. I was perpetually sleep-deprived anyway (that being the typical state of a Corps fish), so the bonfire work is really just a hazy memory. It was also the hardest work I'd done in my life up to that point.
The fact that I never participated in another bonfire construction (I didn't return to the Corps after my freshman year) probably puts me in that shameful "two-percenter" category, but it's a fact of Aggie life that far more students didn't work on the bonfire than did. That doesn't lessen my respect for the tradition it represents.
However, I also agree with a number of commenters on the Texas Monthly article who point out that the bonfire is not Texas A&M, nor are the rich heritage and traditions of the university diminished significantly by its absence.
My wife and I visited the on-campus Bonfire Memorial a couple of summers ago, on a day so brutally hot and humid that it was all we could do to muster the energy to walk from the car to the Stonehenge-like setting where the twelve students who perished were honored. But we found the memorial to be so moving that we spent more than an hour reading the stories of those young people, and watching other visitors move respectfully along with us, no one speaking above a whisper. To me, that desire and ability to honor fellow Aggies is the most important tradition of them all, and as long as that doesn't change, the A&M heritage is secure.
Aggies Infiltrate Austin
September 21, 2009 6:05 AM | Posted in: Texas

This photo was graciously sent to me by Gazette reader Lisa, a Georgetown resident whose husband's construction company just celebrated the topping-out of what is now Austin's tallest building (legacy media news report). Here's an excerpt from Lisa's transmittal email:
In case you don't know, Mack Brown is the head football coach for UT (or, tu, for my Aggie compadres). I can't help wondering what surprises might await Coach Brown once he's moved into his new digs.
As "Newsroom Stew" puts it, it does seem odd to suggest that Midland should follow Austin's lead in, well, just about anything (full disclosure: Stew and I are both Aggies, and predisposed by genetic make-up to disagreeing with just about anything coming out of Austin), but in this case I think they're getting it right. Of course, Stew was probably referring more to the ban on texting while driving more than the safe passing issue, but I do agree that both would be welcome additions to our local ordinances.
It doesn't hurt that the ACLU is opposed to them.
- Now, about that cover... is a post from the author of the book by the same name, and it deals with how the quite striking cover of his book came to be. The photo shown on the front cover depicts a book that has been soaked in water and the pages arranged into a striking organic shape. This technique is the brainchild of Houston-based photographer Cara Barer, who is quick to point out that no valuable books are harmed in the making of her pictures.
I feel compelled to note that my wife has at times created this effect by nodding off in the bathtub with book in hand. - And speaking of bending paper to your will, check out these amazing origami creations by Won Park. Given the value of the dollar lately, this is as good a use as any for a bill.
- I'm a sucker for panoramic photography, because I can't figure out how to do it myself. Here's a great example, taken at Shoshone Point in the Grand Canyon National Park. If you have a fast internet connection and faster computer, click the "full screen" link to get the full vertigo-inducing effect.
- And, last but not least, I was happy to see that Texas Governor Rick Perry garnered Bicycling Magazine's "Wheelsucker of the Month" award for his veto of the Safe Passing bill at the end of the last legislative session. Perry claims to be a cyclist, and, indeed, recently injured himself during a ride, so you'd think he'd have more empathy. But he's a politician first and foremost, and thus can't be counted on to do the right thing. Anyway, BikeTexas, the state's cycling advocacy group, has an online petition urging passage of the bill (while simultaneously expressing displeasure at the veto). If you're a Texas cyclist, pedestrian, farm equipment operator, or "concerned motorist" (which should pretty much encompass all of us), please consider dropping by to sign the petition. It may not accomplish anything more than making me feel better, but this is, after all, all about me.
The more perceptive among you may also notice a large button on the right side of this page that links to the petition, in case you weren't able to read this far.
The Texas Commission on Environmental Quality (TCEQ) created the "Drive A Clean Machine" program with an explicit goal of removing proven polluters from state roadways. It offers a cash voucher up to $3,500 for the trade-in of a vehicle that's at least 10 years old, gasoline-powered, and that has failed an emissions test.
Interestingly, this program can be used in conjunction with the federal program, so that those fortunate few who qualify can receive up to $7,500 towards a new car. In fact, I had dinner last night with a recipient of this governmental largess. He's now driving a cool little Kia instead of an SUV with 200,000 miles and a steadily burning "check engine" light.
So, why haven't we seen this program trumpeted in the endless dealership ads in our area? Simple. The state program is limited to residents of 16 (out of 254) Texas counties. Presumably, these are the counties deemed to have the worst air quality in the state and thus most likely to benefit from the removal of the "clunkers." All of the counties are in the Austin, Houston, or Metroplex areas (wonder why Bexar County - San Antonio - was left out?).
The program also has a number of other restrictions, including limits on the income of the buyer and cost of the new vehicle (which doesn't actually have to be new; some used vehicles qualify).
Unlike the federal program which gives only lip service to environmental motivations, the Texas program is explicitly tied to a measurable (albeit still non-quantifiable) benefit to the environment.
And while we in the Permian Basin may be tempted to chafe a bit at not having access to this program, we should find consolation in (at least) three things. First, we live in an area where man-made air pollution* is simply not an issue. Second, the process for taking advantage of the state's program makes the federal program look like child's play; the feds could learn something about bureaucracy from the TCEQ. And third, we don't have to live in Austin, Houston, or the Metroplex.
*Let us agree not to discuss blowing dust.

As I've mentioned a couple of times, we spent the July 4th weekend at Canyon Lake, in the Texas Hill Country. We went there without much of an agenda, other than tubing down the Guadalupe River (a pastime, by the way, whose attraction escapes me, but Debbie grew up with fond memories of tubing the Frio River so I suppose we were trying to recapture her childhood. But, I digress; this is not about that.).
Having a relatively uncluttered schedule, when we saw numerous signs advertising a "sock hop" featuring the music of Johnny Dee & the Rocket 88's, one of us decided that we ought to go.
Parenthetical aside, sans parentheses: Now, lest you misinterpret the preceding sentence, let me assure you that despite all claims to the contrary, I am not a stick-in-the-mud. Well, not always. I'm just, well, deliberate. I had my reasons for initially being less than enthusiastic, and those reasons proved to be remarkably relevant as we shall soon see.
It took us a while to discover the reason for this event - it was a fund-raiser for a community service group, but after talking to a couple of enthusiastic volunteers and learning that it was an annual and well-attended event, we decided to shell out $50 for two tickets. We decided that, if nothing else, we could hear some fun music, and maybe get to practice a few dance moves in front of people who would likely never see us again. That's a liberating concept, by the way.
Neither of us had packed in anticipation of a dance, but with the understanding that this was a very casual affair, we headed for the J.C. Penney's store in nearby New Braunfels where Debbie found a fetching sundress and I scored a couple of pairs of ridiculously plaid shorts, the kind all the Kool Kids are wearing nowadays. Shoes were a slight concern, but I figured that my low-top All-Stars would fit in with the sock hop theme, and Debbie never travels with fewer than a dozen pairs, and surely one of them would work.
We had been informed that while the dance got underway at 8:00pm, there would be a dance instructor on hand earlier to give a few swing lessons to those who were interested. Since this was our first time at the event, we showed up early, and joined in the group lessons even though they were pretty basic. It was during those lessons that my initial concerns began to assume enhanced credibility.
If you were anywhere near the Hill Country over the 4th of July weekend, you know how hot it was. Temperatures were in triple digits every day, and the humidity pushed the heat index into the danger zone. Thus the temperature was still in the upper 90s when the dance began, and did I mention that it took place in an non-air-conditioned, gym-sized metal building? The organizers had set up an industrial strength fan in front of one of the four garage doors set in the sides of the building, but there was no cross ventilation so the fan didn't provide any relief unless you stood directly in front of it.
And thus we found ourselves glowing intensely following the rather mild dance lessons...and it was obvious what was coming.
The band fired up promptly at 8:00 (and if you've never been to a JD&tR88s show, you're missing a great time; these guys are pros, in every sense of the word) and while the majority of the 300 or so in attendance were content to sit and listen, the concrete dance floor was crowded throughout the evening. As you might expect from a 50s/60s retro band, most of the music was fast, and so we spent most of our time doing swing and cha cha, with an occasional rumba thrown in. We also spent all of our time sweating.
We'll never again complain about the air conditioning not being turned up enough at our ballroom dances, because we learned that evening what it means to truly sweat to the oldies. I'm talking dripping-off-your-fingertips, flung-off-the-ends-of-your-hair (well, not mine, of course), do-you-think-these-clothes-are-ruined? levels of sweat. And that was after just three dances.
Still, we quickly realized that everyone was in the same boat - the same sticky, soggy, smelly boat - and we decided just to enjoy the music and the dancing. As I said, chances were good that no one would ever see us again, and there's a lot to be said for anonymity in a situation like that.
But when the band took its first break, the aforementioned dance instructor made her way through the row of tables to where we were sitting (and dripping). She crouched down next to us and quietly asked if we could come up to the front of the bandstand at the next break. Oh, great; we've violated a local standard of personal hygiene and they want to make an example of us before they run us out of town. OK, that sounds silly, but not as silly as the real reason.
The instructor leaned forward and said (I swear this is the truth), "we've been watching the dancers and we want to recognize three couples who are doing the best job, and you are one of them." Debbie and I could barely stifle our disbelieving laughter. I mean, while we weren't falling down on the dance floor, or if we were it was gracefully choreographed, we also weren't (in our humble opinions) doing anything worthy of what was obviously A Major Award.
But, I'll admit we were flattered. And so we gratefully and humbly accepted our Major Award during the next break, still sweating like Mississippi chain gang workers. Finally, we had tangible evidence that the literally thousands of dollars we've invested in dancing (if you total the cost of the lessons, dances, ball gowns and shoes, tuxedo and accouterments, and so on) over the last three years has paid off.
And we have the denim apron, soy candle, and bar of scented soap to prove it.
What can I say? It was a fund-raiser, and local merchants donated the awards. And, as they say, beggars can't be choosers. Especially really sweaty ones.
When we checked in, the proprietor - a friendly fellow named Jack - anticipated our question. The name of the road is derived from the presence of Texas Madrone trees (Arbutus xalapensis) on the hillside on which the Inn is constructed. Madrones have a fairly limited range in the Texas Hill Country and Edwards Plateau, and the "Naked Indian" nickname is derived from their "bark exfoliation" characteristic. That is, they periodically shed their bark, and the new bark has a wide range of colors, going to a deep apricot or red that gives rise to the politically-dubious ethnic appellation.
Can't picture it? Here are a few photos I took of some of the specimens on the hillside above the Inn.





