The Vanishing Fire Ant

Update (4/6/11) I submitted a request for a refund via CafePress's website and within 15 minutes was notified by email that they were granting it. They also said I could keep the shirts. Apparently they don't want Fire Ant-less shirts either. Anyway, the interesting thing was this statement by the customer service rep: "I have checked into the image and see the "Fire Ant" design is kind of faint and may be hard to print on the dark t-shirts." The implication is that the design is flawed, but I've previously ordered black and brown t-shirts with this exact graphic and they printed fine. But they have me worried now, so I guess I'll embolden the Fire Ant graphic and update the shirts so that no one else has deal with the issue.

CafePress sent a notice about their limited-time "storekeeper's sale" wherein those of us with virtual storefronts could order our own merchandise at a discount. Since no one else will order Fire Ant t-shirts (*sob*) I decided to refresh my own wardrobe (much to my wife's chagrin) and ordered three new black t-shirts in various colors. 

(Yes, you read that correctly; CafePress now calls them "dark t-shirts" but my store has the original description of "Black comes in assorted colors!", just another thing about life that confuses and bemuses me.)

The UPS guy sneaked in sometime last night and left a package on the porch, which should give you a clue about the reputation of the Fire Ant Store; I'm surprised it wasn't discretely wrapped in brown paper. I was like a kid on the 16th morning after Christmas Day, excitedly tearing into the package. The shirts looked great, but there was something, I don't know, not quite right.

Now, here's what the t-shirt looks like on the website when you order it. Move your cursor over the photo, then drag the yellow line* to the left to see what the shirt that actually showed up looks like. (If you don't see a yellow line, just click on the left side of the image. Then, go download a decent browser to replace the old and busted one you're using.)

Notice any difference?

Now, I know that many (most) people think of fire ants as nuisances to be avoided, if not fatally killed. But, seriously, CafePress...must you go to such lengths?

*If there's a silver lining to this situation, it's that I finally found a semi-practical use for this "slide to reveal" jQuery script!


Congratulations, Eric, you have just achieved the completely improbable, the eradication of the Red Imported Fire Ant from an entire habitat once it is well-established. This may be a first on the Continental US.

You will now find a surprising level of difficulty in obtaining a position with almost any of the nation's larger pest control companies or chemical manufacturers.


yo-yo-pa pa-haps?

Fiddlesticks . . .

Whoops. You can rest assured no-one around here wants to see the CToUs roused from their slumber, let alone revisited.

"Jumped up parade of elliptical hypocrisies" was dear old Auntie Rotter's parting shot the last time we paid a visit.

My apologies to all concerned.

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This page contains a single entry by Eric published on March 30, 2011 1:26 PM.

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